Showing posts with label Partnered. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Partnered. Show all posts

November 18, 2011

Chris

Chris, age 8
Grayling, Michigan (1998)

This picture really demonstrates what kind of kid I was - lively, goofy, and obviously gay.

I don't really crossdress at all now, but I remember when my family did this as a joke, I felt some part of it seemed right.

It was around this age that I first realized I was different. I was, at the very least, aware that I also liked guys.

Especially Tony, the cute boy in my 3rd grade music class.

However, I didn't come out until I moved out of my home and started college, a process which was well received by all.

Although, it took my parents a bit of time to come around.

Today, I live in Ann Arbor, MI with my wonderful partner of nearly two years, and study Art History at E. Michigan University.

For the kids out there reading this, I say:
Be yourselves, and when you are ready, make the leap.
___________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin'

October 28, 2011

Nic

Nic, age 6
Quincy, CA (1965)

I'm the cutie in the blue and white striped shirt and belt. My grandmother made that for me. I guess she's the one who got me started with accessorizing. She also made clothes for my Troll dolls, and was very protective of me.


I grew up in a redneck town where boys were taught to hunt and fish and all that stuff. My friends were always girls. I recall playing house with one of my friends and I told her I wanted to be the Mommy, and she sternly told me "No!" It turns out, she's now a lesbian.

Much of my internalized guilt and fear of exposure made me a very bitter and angry kid. I also suspect it played a huge part in me having cancer at age 22.

I remember my grandmother telling my mom that she saw two men walking down the street in San Francisco, acting like they were a married couple. Even at age 6, something clicked in my head and I blurted out to her, 'I want to marry a man when I grow up!'

Of course she was horrified and aghast, and said, "But you can't." That moment I revealed myself to her was the first time I was told that being gay was a bad thing.

But today, I know being gay is a very good thing.
And indeed, I married my husband on 6/18/2008.
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Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

October 10, 2011

Alexa

Alexa, age 10
Los Angeles, California (1991)

I always was the biggest tomboy growing up. Whether it was a skateboard in hand or basketball, I spent most of my childhood heavily involved in sports or things considered "boys" hobbies. The thing I remember most was that I always had guy friends, and only ONE girl friend. But this girl was the ultimate girl. She had long blonde hair, played with Barbies, and was everything I was not. This was always interesting to my parents, as I never really changed as I got older.


I ended up at an all-girls school, with even less male friends. But I would always have that one really girlie best friend who meant the world to me, even if she just watched me play all my "boy" games. I now realize that maybe it was more than a friendship for me, even if I didn't understand what it all meant. Fortunately, I was never bullied or teased growing up, which I guess makes me blessed.

Years later, my "coming out" to my parents as a junior in college proved to be the hardest time in my life. It's been almost 7 years since then, and my parents have done a 180 and they could not be more supportive. That hard time somehow brought us closer, and my mother is now helping plan my upcoming wedding.

I now work as a creative music video producer for Interscope Records. And I'll be marrying Sam - my partner and best "girlie" friend of 3 years - this December. And we hope to have a beautiful family filled with love and freedom one day.

The message I would give to any LGBTQ kid is:
Always believe in yourself and be who you are. I honestly believe the main reason I was never bullied as a kid, is because I was never scared of who I was, or felt that I was different. I just projected how I felt and did what I wanted to do - without caring about what other people thought about me!

The memories I have of my tomboy ways will forever remain true.
And note the "Transformer" on the skateboard. It was cool then and still is now!:)

Alexa's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Sally Field (as "Gidget")
I thought she was the coolest chick on the beach, and I wanted to be her!

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

September 19, 2011

David

David, age 3
Fresno, California (1977)

I think I knew I was "different" around age 4. I liked being around the girls in school more than the boys. As I got older, I would be teased and called "f*g" and "sissy." I didn't know what that meant, but I knew it didn't make me feel good.

When I finally did discover the meaning of those words, I tried to deny it. But my love of Chinese jump rope and my Smurfs lunch box gave me away. Also, I had a strange fascination with Tom Selleck and Lee Horsley, and their hairy chests.

As I got older, I'd spend my free time in my bedroom with a t-shirt on my head and lip-synch in my mirror to Cyndi Lauper and Madonna songs.

Occasionally, I'd throw on a pair of my mom's pantyhose and strut around the house.

My mom would laugh and say, 
"You sure would make a good girl!"

Now as an adult, I'm almost 37-years old. I've been with my husband Richard for 18 years, and we have a good life. Mom lives with us now, and I ran across this picture while digging around in her closet. My grandmother was the one who took me to this photo session. In fact, she's the one who styled me and picked out the "Mary Had A Little Lamb" book I'm holding.

I look at this picture now, and I can see the beginnings of the man I am today.
I live my life openly and freely and I am blessed to have family and friends that accept all of me. Especially the "little girl" that still exists in this photo.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin'

August 15, 2011

Sarah

Sarah, age 4
Tuscon, Arizona (1979)

For this kindergarten photo, I told the photographer I wanted a "serious picture." But the more he tried to make me smile, the more serious I got. And I do NOT like this dress. I wanted to wear my fireman's hat, which I was usually allowed to do, as my parents weren't really invested in any particular gender expression.

I love this picture because of its emotional honesty: I'm not smiling because I don't feel like smiling. And no one was going to push me into feeling or doing something I don't want.

While this is harder to accomplish as an adult, it's always my goal.

At this age, I knew I was a little different, and had a nascent crush on my kindergarten teacher. But I didn't yet have the words for it.

I went on to be viciously bullied in middle school, and I hope those kids are all in jail now.

Today, I have a loving partner and a diverse group of friends, and I became a writer and a teacher.

Bigoted speech -- especially the phrase "That's so gay" -- is forbidden in my classroom. Consequences are swift and severe, if I hear it.

My message to LGBTQ youth is:
Respect yourself! And do not "ignore" the bullying, because it doesn't work.
It only makes you more vulnerable; more victimized.

Bullies can tell when you're "ignoring" them, and it makes them want to do whatever they can to make you crack. The onus for stopping bullying is NOT on you -- it's on the bully, as well as the adults in charge.

You must keep talking, keep complaining, and keep demanding that something
be done - UNTIL SOMETHING IS DONE. Look your principal in the eye, and be sure to mention Jamie Nabozny - who won a huge federal lawsuit against his school administrators for failing to stop anti-gay harassment.

Lastly, keep saving your money...
There are buses leaving every day for other cities, and you can be on them!

Sarah's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Karen Carpenter (singer, The Carpenters)

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Karen Carpenter Original Release 4-3/4x5-3/4 Photo (Appears To Be Cut Out Of Larger Image) #DSC07520Bani Finds Her Something (The LGBTQ Anti-Bullying Series)And It Was Full of Light!: Finding the courage to overcome homophobic bullying and hateGender and Sexual Diversity in Schools (Explorations of Educational Purpose)

July 22, 2011

Darcy

Darcy, age 3
New Philadelphia, Ohio (1987)

As a kid, I was a little odd. I liked girly things to an extent. I was okay with dresses, but not jewelry. I liked dolls, but I preferred crafty creative endeavors more. I guess it was kind of telling that when playing with Barbie dolls, I always had two Barbies living together, with no Ken around. Ken was just not interesting or necessary to me.

I loved Punky Brewster. She was
one of my early role models/loves. The Spice Girls were a major obsession, too. I had a new favorite member every few weeks.

And Gwen Stefani in the No Doubt days was the love of my life.

All these fierce women plastered my bedroom walls in high school.

Sadly, I got teased pretty badly in high school. I was called a slut, a dyke, a freak.

I cut off all my hair in 10th grade, and wore crazy thrift store clothes.

That probably didn't help much, but
I liked looking that way.

I always kissed girls but dated guys, and I tried really hard to make those relationships work.

I thought there was something wrong with me, as I was so unhappy. I spent years in therapy and on medication, thinking I was somehow essentially broken and would never find that spark of joy in my life. I drank heavily and used drugs and hated myself.

Finally, now, at age 27, I have the most amazing, beautiful girlfriend I could ever ask for. I finally feel like the missing piece has been found.

I also learned there was never anything wrong with me. I was just trying to fit into a place that wasn't meant for me. I don’t know what my future holds, but I finally found happiness. And I know I'm just fine exactly the way I am.

Darcy's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Soleil Moon Frye (as "Punky Brewster")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin'

July 05, 2011

Denise

Denise, age 5
Chicago, Illinois (1963)

I would have thought that being thrown out of the Girl Scouts when I was 8 -
for being caught in my sleeping bag with one of my female camp counselors - would have tipped someone off!

Like many before me, I knew early on I was "different" but so afraid to name it.
I didn't want to be a disappointment to my parents and family. Growing up in a large Italian family was tough enough.

Being a lesbian would have destroyed them. Or so I thought. Of course, like most Italian families, we didn't dare talk about such things!

I tried to be correct in my clothes choices and my dating, etc. Although always in sports (clue #2), I pretty much stuck to myself except for the occasional date with a guy to keep my family happy.

I eventually met a nice man named James.
And he put up with a lot from me.

James and I married, and I struggled the entire marriage to make it feel "right." And I wanted to be "normal" in the worst way. We finally divorced and went our separate ways when I met a woman at work, who turned my world upside down.

I officially came out to my family then. And guess what? They weren't surprised!
I was prepared for drama that never came; only love for me through my journey.

I eventually met my current partner in 1983. And we have been friends, lovers, and partners in life ever since. We have 2 beautiful teenage sons, own our own businesses, and a home in Denver, CO. And although our state doesn’t recognize our relationship, all the people that matter and mean the most to us, do.

One day, hopefully soon, we may be able to get legally married.
So my message is this: It does get better. Stay true to you.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin'

June 20, 2011

Drew

Drew, age 6
Pleasant, PA (1970)

I clearly remember when I was very young, I saw a TV toothpaste commercial, showing a mom, dad, and kids who had no cavities by brushing with Crest. Watching that commercial, I knew in my heart my life would be nothing like that. In other words, a life with no wife, and no kids.

It was scary, because I had no idea what was waiting for me instead. That, in essence, was the story of my childhood. I couldn't imagine what
I was going to grow up to become.

So I read every book I could get my hands on, hoping to find any possible way for me to become a man.

Our mom died just before I turned 4.
But lucky for me, I had a sister, 13-years my senior. She was a gorgeous hippie chick in her mid-20's, with tons of men chasing her.

Every Friday night, she took me out roller skating or to the movies. She was the first person who I came out to at age 17, even though I didn't mean to do that.

She made a point of introducing me to friends of hers who were gay and lesbian. And they were balanced, happy, loved, and loving adults. Slowly, I came to understand that there was, or there would be, a place for me in the adult world.

Today, I live in the California desert with the man I love and our two dogs.
I've had an amazing and wonderful life, and I'm sure that there is more to come.

Alas, though: Despite all the brushing and flossing I do, I have never once in my life gone to the dentist and been free of a cavity.

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

June 17, 2011

Brooke

Brooke, age 12
Cottonwood, CA (1994)

I grew up in a small town in N. California. I first knew I was different at age 6, when I told someone on the school bus that I wished I was a boy. I also vaguely remember having a moment then, when I learned what being gay meant. And I wondered if I was, despite not having feelings of attraction towards either gender.

Wait, I think I take that back...

In hindsight, I'm pretty sure buying my 2nd grade teacher's aide a massive cubic zirconium ring was an attempt to woo her.

It didn't work, but she was outta my league anyway. And I did have other crushes, too: My 4th grade teacher - *swoon* - and a summer camp counselor.

I've always been a major "tomboy" and I've always prided myself on my athleticism.

I started playing basketball at the age of 8, and was the only girl on the team. Although, my coach thought he had an all boy team.

I have very early memories of people always confusing my gender with male, even before I cut my hair. While on the inside I felt that my short hair was what I wanted, I was still uncomfortable with people's reactions to my appearance.

Thankfully, I've finally grown into my skin. I feel comfortable with who I am, despite others being confused by my masculine appearance.

Today, I'm grateful for a loving family that only cares about my happiness, and who have been very supportive throughout my coming out process. I couldn't be happier with where I am in life, including marrying my fiance' this fall.

Brooke's first, famous-person same sex crushes:
Helen Hunt (on "Highway To Heaven")
Susan Sarandon (in "The Client")
I envied that boy, and I wanted her to be my lawyer
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Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

Matthew

Matthew, age 3
Virginia Beach, VA (1992)

As a kid, I fondly remember the memories I have of playing with my Barbies.
I loved girly things, and I was always carrying my dolls around with me in my big pink Barbie suitcase. And my first love was the Black Power Ranger.

I didnt realize I was different until 4th grade, when a boy called me gay. And he stole my innocence that day.

I didn't like myself from then on, well until I was around age 16.

If there is one thing I could tell myself back then, and other young gay kids now, it is this:

Love yourself, and be who ever you want to be. Because until you love yourself, how can you expect anyone to love you back? It's hard, but dry those tears - it does get better.

One day you to will find someone who loves you exactly as you are.

Looking back on this photo, I'm proud. I'm proud I wasn't afraid to express my love for beautiful things, just as I'm not afraid to express it now.

I am me, myself, and I - and I was born this way after all.

Now, I'm in my 20's and I'm engaged to marry my partner.
And he's my personal Power Ranger now! :)

Matthew's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Walter Jones (the first "Black Power Ranger")
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Power Ranger Colors Black Ranger [VHS]Power Rangers - Lost Galaxy - Return of Magna Defender [VHS]The Good, the Bad, and the Barbie: A Doll's History and Her Impact on UsLesbian and Gay Richmond (Images of America: Virginia)

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

June 13, 2011

Beverly

Beverly, age 9
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania (1970)

That's me on the left with my niece Denise, playing our favorite game of "house," which we called “Billy." Of course, I was ALWAYS Billy - the protector and the adventurer. As long as I can remember, I enjoyed dressing up, and pretending to be someone other than myself.

I was equally comfortable pretending to be a rock 'n roll singer in a band, or donning a costume as a bit part in a dinner-theater type show.

I was raised as an only child and was very involved in theater. I felt most comfortable and happy around actors, although my parents were very leery, referring to many of them as "queer."

Although I knew perfectly well what they meant, I never let on, as I was afraid they wouldn't let me associate with them.


As a heavy child, I was called a "lezzy" well before I even knew what it meant. While I suppose I always knew I was attracted to women at some level, I felt I had to act or dress up like a boy (and PRETEND to be a boy) to get away with it.

While I look fairly butch here, I later preferred being rather androgynous. And I ended up being a very late bloomer, not coming out until I was in grad school.

I refer to that realization as my Technicolor moment, like when Dorothy opens up the door to Oz to find her drab black and white world has become full of color.

Today, my partner and I have 6 adopted children.

And our kids have no problems having two "mommies." As a matter of fact, my youngest asked me to accompany her to a father-daughter dance recently, and I even got to wear a dress!

Beverly's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Jennifer Beals (in "Flashdance")
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FlashdanceBetween Mom and JoMom, Mama, and MeLate Bloomers: Awakening to Lesbianism After Forty
Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

Joshua

Joshua, age 12
Los Angeles, California (1995)

My childhood was a bumpy one. I was raised in Los Angeles by a single mother, who it turned out was suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder. Sadly, it was not as entertaining as "United States of Tara" is each week.

I knew I was different at the age of 10. Back then, I had intense crushes on all of my best friends growing up.

I bounced around between foster homes and group homes from age 10 to 15. I came out at 15, and it was the best decision I have ever made.

My best friend then knew I was in love with him, and was OK with that as long as I didn't 'try anything funny'.

And actually, after coming out, everyone was so kind and loving.

I'm now a professional ballet dancer, and I've been partnered with my husband and best friend for 7 years.


I'm going to grad school in the fall, and I'm making a documentary following a group LGBT kids in their early teens, to give voice to a younger demographic of kids experienceing this. If you'd like to participate, you can contact me HERE.

I love being gay, and I wouldn't want to be any other way. I hope my film helps kids come to that place in life a lot sooner than I did.

Things do GET better, but they'll also be better NOW if we do something about it. Someday, being young and gay will be as taboo as being young and short, or having freckles. And I want to make that day come soon.

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

May 29, 2011

Carlos

Carlos, age 7
RS, Brazil (1998)

I live in Brazil, and somehow I always knew that I was gay.


I had many years of discovering myself, and I'm finally happy with who I am!
Now, I'm so lucky with all that I have: my friends, my family, and my boyfriend.

And to all who might feel sad now, there 
is a happy ending!