Bloomington, CA (1984)
I remember as a kid, I was always a tomboy. I always hung around boys - or girls that were tomboys. I spent the most time with my uncle who's only 5 years older than me. He was always more like my brother than my uncle. I loved playing all sports with him, including tackle football.
|"I was never a girlie girl"|
When I was about 4 years old I asked my mom, 'Are you sure I'm not a boy?' My mom tried very hard to make me a girlie girl, but it never worked. Although, once she entered me in a local beauty pageant when I was 10, and I won 2nd runner-up Queen.
Coming out to my parents was a very negative experience for me. I've learned over the years to just not bring up the fact that I'm a lesbian to them.
But I now have a wonderful life partner. We just celebrated our 13th anniversary together, and we have a 7-year old daughter that we adopted together.
Fortunately, my partner's family is very supportive of our relationship, and our daughter is able to grow up having a typical grandparent relationship with them.
I've found in my life that I have been very fortunate to have wonderful supportive friends that I consider my family. My partner, daughter and I are very involved in our Unitarian Universalist church, and we have many wonderful close friends in our congregation that we consider family as well.
My advise for young people struggling with coming out is: Be yourself, you're beautiful just the way you are, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. If coming out is a negative experience for you, I can understand what you're going through. I've learned in my life to just surround myself with those that accept me as I am, and not who they want me to be.
I know things may be hard right now, but trust me that as you get older and surround yourself with those that love you and accept you as you are, you'll discover that the ones that didn't accept you are the ones with the problem.
You are beautiful just the way you are.
I remember how much I loved that show because of her. She didn't care that she was different from the other girls, and wasn't afraid to just be herself.