December 12, 2011

Remiel

Remiel, age 8
Otago, New Zealand (1997)

I love this photo, because it was a victory for me. It meant I was going to attend the Cub Scouts with the other boys, instead of the Brownies with the girls. Yup, back then this cheeky chappie was a girl.

My parents kept my hair short, and I wore hand me downs from the older boys in my family. My family accepted my gender presentation, and still do. My dad used to boast about how strong I was.

When I was young, I assumed I was a boy. So puberty came as a depressing realization. I didn't grow my hair until I was 14, and only relented to dresses at 16.

It took me a long time to realize I was different. And I only figured it out when every time I imagined myself, I imagined myself as male.

As a kid, I ran around in a pack of boys playing sport and making messes. The other kids called me boy-girl. Seems they knew a dozen or so years before I would!

Now I'm genderqueer, gay, and coming to accept my place in the world.
I still like "guy things," but I'm a pretty femme gay guy.

One thing that never changes though: I still get asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?"
My answer: Yes!

Remiel's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Christian Cullen (All Blacks' rugby player)

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4 comments:

Randuwa said...

Like what you like and be who you are! Great post, friend.

Just Two Chicks said...

Love your story... just one question because I am ignorant about some things. Let's call it not getting out enough. What is gender queer?

I've had a few friends who are asked if they are girls or boys by children. They are butchy girls and identify as female.

I had another friend who went from being female to male, and she was attracted to women.

Unknown said...

Wow thought I was looking @ a boy...LOVE THIS!

JCF said...

"What is gender queer?"

Well, as a genderqueer myself (FWIW, my story is
here), I would define it as

"Androgynous . . . only Sexier!"

;-D