Kelly

Kelly, age 9
Cordell, Oklahoma (1986)

I was born n' raised in a small rural town in Oklahoma. My Daddy was the high school football coach, my brother was the all-star athlete, and my uncle (my Dad's older brother) is Mickey Mantle of the New York Yankees. No big deal, he's just mentioned right up there with Uncle Sam, apple pie, and Jesus Christ.

And then there was ME!

Townsfolk would ask, "Kelly...you gonna grow up and be a famous baseball player like your Uncle Mickey?”

'No,' I'd say. 'When I grow up, I'm gonna be a black soul singer just like Diana Ross.' 

Because one is just about as likely as the other.

The only thing Uncle Mickey and I had in common was switch-hitting!

As a kid, I used to dress up in Grandma's clothes and play Dolly Parton songs on my lil' geetar.

And they had no clue what the hell was happening!

But regardless, I was blessed with parents who always encouraged me to embrace my differences and “eccentricities.” They accepted me as every parent should for their child! Bless their wrinkled little hearts.

And as you can see in this picture, I LOVED being a little girly-boy. I think I had just told Santa that I wanted a Barbie, a boy, and some boobies! It made him very uncomfortable, and I didn't understand why. Because I loved being different than my peers, and I wasn't ashamed to be me.

That's a true testament to my upbringing.

But, like most of us, I had my fair share of getting bullied from time to time. Usually from kids from other schools at out-of-town events. Their favorite taunt was always "Are you a boyyyy or a girrrrl?" And I'd say 'Both!' Like it was a bad thing? I never could figure that out. Who wouldn't wanna be both?

Luckily, because of our LGBTQ pioneers that came before me, we now have terminology that kids can use today. In my case, it would be "gender-fluid."
Or as I prefer, "two-spirit" because after all I AM a Cherokee Native American Poke-A-Hot-Ass from Oklahomo.

So when I look at this picture of me and Santa, that's who I see — a late blooming two-spirited little gender-fluid kid, almost too comfortable in my own skin — but unsure how to explain it to others. Yet, never afraid to show it or be it, and most importantly — never once told to hide it.

And that would be my Christmas wish to Santa today — for every little boy and girl and in-between to be given the freedom to be in love with yourself exactly as you are! And to realize that when another person tries to hurt you, they're actually the one who's hurting.

Because people who love themselves, don't hurt others.
So don't ever let anyone change who you were born to be.

I’m Kelly Mantle, and I was BORN THIS WAY!
______________________________________________________

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Lenny

Lenny, age 3
Bellevue, Idaho (1947)

I was known as Little Lenny, the "City Boy" with wild west affiliations combined with an English bloodline. My great grandparents were pioneers to the West and were among the earliest ranchers and silver-mining adventurers in Southern Idaho. I have a little Native American blood, too.

I always felt different deep down. You know what I mean? As a young child I slept outside in the summertime and stared up at the stars, pondering: 

Where does life end? 
How far is infinity? 

Nobody knows everything, but I knew being different was unanswerable even then. I had no choice but to go along with life and take a ride.

From my earliest memories I knew I was not like everyone else. But I didn't know what "gay" actually was back then. 

People mostly liked me, but I do have an older sister who sent me to the emergency room after various baby-sitting "accident" occasions. Truthfully, I would call those homicidal inclinations. 

I still have scars, and I call her "the assassin" to this day. She pretends she doesn't remember any of this because I was an "adorable" child. Yeah, right.

I know that life can be a double challenge for LGBTI people of all nationalities and races. I come from hearty English-American stock and we keep on moving no matter what troubles we encounter. It's the American Way!

I also know that we are everyone's child, sister, brother, co-worker and best friend. Gay people are a part of life and we share our lives with everyone. 

Nothing can change that fact!

I am now 72 years old and an active artist, and I live at the foot of an active volcano in Central America. I have always loved my life, and I still love my life.

And I still stare up at the stars in the heavens and feel inspired by life around me. The life I have been given is the one I deeply enjoy and am grateful to always have had. So for all the young gay kids reading this now, I will tell you: 

IT GETS BETTER! It honestly does.
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Norn

Norn, age 6
St. Petersburg, Florida (1975)

It was October 1975, and my my mom dressed my little sister and I up as "hookers" for Halloween. "Hookers" was a sure laugh-riot for any occasion,
but I wonder now what we thought "hookers" were?

I remember mom instructed us to "Swing your purse a lot!"

My mom also used to dress me up as Shirley Temple, Tina Turner, Cher, or Gilda Radner and have me perform for her friends during their cocktail hour. Wigs, dresses, heels, etc. They would HOWL with laughter as I camped it up, and I LOVED getting laughs!

But as I got older, and dressed in drag by my own choice, my mom grew more alarmed. Suddenly this thing that I was rewarded for, the thing that got me attention, I was now being punished for.

I'll just turned 47, and that betrayal still feels raw... Though I hadn't even thought of that until I found this photo.

But today, I still wear whatever I want and I still love to get laughs!
And my art and illustrations feature and salute many of the ladies I love.
______________________________________________________

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Christopher

Christopher, age 8

Sulligent, Alabama (1979)

Clearly as displayed in my photo, I already knew how to descend a staircase with flair while holding a cocktail. Even though that’s probably just a Pepsi...

But as one might imagine, growing up in rural Alabama was challenging for me. 

I certainly wasn’t like all the other kids, and because of that I was an easy target for name-calling and bullying - of which there was plenty. And, of course, I had to remain “closeted” until I left home. Even though everyone knew that I was as gay as a Christmas goose, it simply wasn’t discussed.  

One particular Sunday evening when I was only about 3-years old, Miss Christine was visiting during our family's weekly "visit" gatherings, which meant lots of gossip. She was one of our town’s hairdressers who sported a bouffant so high it was in danger of being caught in our ceiling fan. She was always very smartly dressed, with impeccably polished nails and perfect hair. 

I was fascinated with Miss Christine. She was like a real-life Dolly Parton - minus the huge tits and rhinestones - right there in my living room. However, even the snappiest dressers can drop the ball, and one Sunday evening I went over to Miss Christine, crawled into her lap, looked her straight in the eye and said - keep in mind, I wasn’t yet four years old:

'Miss Christine, you look real pretty...

But your purse and your shoes don’t match.'

Let's just say it was the first time I made a room fall apart!

Once I got to college in the larger city of Birmingham, I began to realize there was a great big world outside of my small hometown. And I finally was able to start becoming the person I was meant to be, in all my glitter-encrusted glory.

I launched a successful career as a professional dancer and choreographer, traveling all over the U.S. with musicals and working with some of the greatest pros in show business. I have had the good fortune to live in New York, San Francisco, and now currently Los Angeles. And I’m blessed to share a gorgeous home with my amazing husband and our two cats. 

Currently, I “co-exist” with the “showgirl, chanteuse, and Southern belle” Poppy Fields and perform as one-half of the cabaret act “Mack & Poppy.”

It does indeed “get better” - but here’s the catch: You have to make it get better, and realize that there are always hardships, always tests, and always people who will hurl insults your way - even when you’re an adult.  

You learn, though, to remember that the ones who take issue with you and/or your sexuality are insignificant, and those who are truly meant to be part of your life, or are important in your life, don’t give a damn who you love.

All-in-all, it’s been an amazing ride and great life, and it’s still going strong. 

And I sure learned a lot from those “steel magnolias” that surrounded me as a child; and I know that wherever she is now, Miss Christine would be pleased that my purse and my shoes always match!

______________________________________________________

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Mark

Mark, age 6
Centralia, Washington (1968)

My first grade teacher Mrs. Carlson wrote on my report card:
"Mark is a very sensitive child, wants attention, and needs reassurance. 
He expresses himself very well through his artwork, is quite creative, and has quite a flair for play-acting. He really puts himself into it and does quite a good job." Great insight on her part, as I have become a professional entertainer. 

Mrs. Carlson could also see I was gay, and 'Sensitive' was another 1960's American code word for homosexual. 

She also knew I had no friends in a town full of kids. It was hard to miss them chanting 'Finley Faggot' during recess, or from over her fence on an occasional weekend visit. 

She opened my world to the fine arts by way of the local library. The works she put in front of me all had the same theme - the misunderstood overcoming their adversity to shine greater than ever before. 


Not having friends, I lost myself in reading, listening to records, and stamp collecting. Then my maternal grandfather gave me two amazing gifts: a spinet piano and a 12-inch black & white television. Thanks to him I poured myself into practicing my piano and recreating scenes from the movies I watched at night.

I couldn't catch a ball of any kind, but I could do a great Mae West and W.C. Fields routine complete with a chorus of "Willie Of The Valley." Soon it was quite clear to my parents that my 'creative flair' was not simply a phase.

I'd love to say that it was all sunshine and lollipops after that, but I'd be lying. 
The rest of my childhood was nothing short of a living hell. 

But at age 10 I was in my first play (a community theatre production of an old English melodrama), and I stole the show. I had finally found the one place I was happy and content. Not to mention safe from the constant torment that was the rest of my adolescence. 

Some would say that I escaped into my own private world with theatre. 
But I would say it gave me the chance to escape and join the world! 

As an adult, my performing has taken me all around the world on many wonderful adventures. It was not easy growing up 'different' in a small town in rural Washington. But I am forever thankful that Mrs. Carlson gave me hope that happiness was possible!
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Austin

Austin, age 4
Novato, California (1978)

“Mom, what is gay?” That’s what left my lips one day when I returned home from kindergarten. After having been called it over and over, I kinda wanted to know what it meant. Mom did what she’s done my entire life - she told me the truth. No judgment. No shame. Just truth.

Even though I had no idea what sexual orientation was, 

I knew this much: I wasn’t going to be something people saw as different, even if I was. 

And I spent the next 20 years living up to my misguided commitment.

Through all of the bullying, teasing, hurt, and loneliness,  I fooled myself into believing if I didn’t acknowledge being gay, it wasn’t real. 

I remember looking at Ricky Schroeder on "Silver Spoons" and thinking:

"I think I ‘like’ him. But only gay boys ‘like’ other boys, so I’ll just not like him."

And I never watched "Silver Spoons" again. It was all too real. 

The only one I was fooling was myself. As was evidenced when I began my coming out at age 25. That process was both wonderful and frustrating. I didn’t have one negative reaction to my coming out, which was such a relief.

What I found frustrating was this: when you finally make the agonizing decision to come out, you want a certain kind of “TA-DAH!” moment. Well, no one was surprised. It was more like a “Well, duh!” moment. Over. And over. And over. 

It was better than the alternative, but it took me some time to get comfortable in this “new” skin, the skin everyone was aware of but me. I had to get to know myself all over again. 

I’m still in the middle of that process. During the past 15 years, I’ve been the most destroyed and most overjoyed I’ve ever been. I consider my high-highs and low-lows evidence that I’m living a full life. I’ve loved. I’ve lost. I’ve grown. I’ve learned. 

My true passion is photography, and I’ve been fortunate enough to have really beautiful subjects in front of my lens, both inanimate and human alike. I’m so proud of who I am, who I'm surrounded by, and the man I continue to become. 

As I look at this picture now, I see exactly what I want to see:
A carefree, flamboyant young boy just living in the moment. 

If I could go back and talk to my 4 year-old self, I’d say nothing more than:

“Just be yourself, kiddo. It’s going to be a fabulous ride.”

_____________________________________________________

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Robert

Robert, age 5
White Settlement, Texas (1943)

This was snapped on my first day of school, in a place called "Liberator Village." "Liberators" were bomber war planes made in a factory there, and my tiny Mama crawled inside their wings and welded things.

Back then, kids couldn't start school till after their 6th birthday. But because Mama didn't want me to wait till I was nearly 7 to start, she falsified my birth date so I could start when I was still age 5.

Because I read well, I was quickly promoted to 2nd grade. Although lonely among older kids, I wasn't afraid of school.

One summer, I had lured neighbor boys into the schoolhouse's deeply-recessed doorways to play "You show me yours, I’ll show you mine."

I never had problems about my gayness. Because homosexuality was so feared,
no one ever talked about it or warned me against it. So I wasn't indoctrinated.

Also, I read Sappho, Catullus, Isherwood, and Auden early, and it was actually harder being smart than it was being gay.

I was beat up through high-school for "carrying too many books." Although both straight and gay boys attended my notorious "slumber parties," they were afraid to befriend me in everyday life.

Thus, I lived vicariously through movies and books, and instead of having steady boyfriends, I secretly worshiped movie star Tab Hunter.

Later in life I was alone and maladjusted. I dropped out of college and was thrown out of the Air Force. I fortunately visited New York and wandered into the Caffe Cino, the first Off-Off Broadway Theatre - and the birthplace of gay theatre.

And it was there, at last, that I found artistic, intelligent, gay friends and lovers. Though I was openly gay, I had an international playwrighting career.

It’s somewhat easier being gay today, but things can change in an instant.
Or worse, they can change with an election. So be wise and be wary, kids.
_____________________________________________________

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Karl

Karl, age 3
Arlington, Texas (1964)

In this family photo, I was consciously trying to be cute and coy for the cameraman. At that age I just wanted to be around other males, as all the neighborhood kids and my young cousins were girls. And my father was the physically-present but emotionally-absent type.

At school I figured out that I was more interested in music than most other boys. I wasn't good at sports, so I thought my feelings toward guys were just hero worship.

As a teen I became more aware of my attraction to men, but I just didn't know what to call it.

In 1977, I got my first job as a puppeteer at Six Flags Over Texas. That is where I learned what "gay" meant - while learning the lyrics to "A Chorus Line," "Annie," and "The Rocky Horror Picture Show."

Now I knew what to call what I'd been feeling, although I was terrified by what my church thought of it.

And then Baptist Panic set in: my Youth Minister assisted me in writing a letter declining to return to performing the next season. I was – and still am – a very good puppeteer; I think I could have gone far if I had just kept with it. Still, my attractions would not disappear.

Fighting my urges, I put myself through pastoral counseling to attempt to become straight. I soon attended college with the goal of becoming a Baptist music minister. And neither of those things happened for me.

After three years of counseling I accepted myself, I came out, and I immediately thought, "What am I going to do with this degree?" - and a job that has nothing to do with music.

But I'm now a volunteer performer with the local gay band and an orchestra, and I sign interpret the songs at the largest primarily gay church in the world.

Through my interest in music I met my wonderful spouse of 13 years, who sings opera part-time. One sister is very accepting of me and my partner, the other isn't – but that’s OK.

If I could tell my younger self anything, it would be to not care what others thought and to go ahead and to be himself.
_____________________________________________________

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Dan

Dan, age 1
Islip, New York (1967)

I don't remember this New Year's Day picture at a Fort Lauderdale beach, as I was still an infant. But as you can see, the cat was clearly already out of the bag!

It would remain out of the bag til this very day, and there wasn't a thing I or anyone else could do about it. I think my mom's expression show's a bit of shock, while my grandma is full of GLEE! My dad, as usual, was in his own world.

I was very different right from the get go. I was the toe-headed blond, while my sister and brother (8 and 10 years older than me) were both darker and brunettes.

As the story is told, my mother asked my sister and brother: "Do you want a baby or a puppy?" "Puppy!!!" they both exclaimed. "Too late," my mother replied.
And the rest was history...

Later in life, I would go on to create videos with fabulous divas like Madonna, Cher, Ann-Margret, and The Go-Go's. And now they call me "Dan-O-Rama."
__________________________________________________

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Josef

Josef, age 12
Košice, Slovakia (1992)

Growing up in Slovakia, I always knew that I was gay. I was interested in fashion, experimenting with my hair styles, and I was a big Madonna fan and collector. I always remember being interested in boys, and I had a shirtless photo of David Hasselhoff that I treasured.

I once entered a talent competition dressed as Madonna to sing "Express Yourself," and I won the final round!

I performed this many times around the city, and I really felt like a diva. I mean, just look at my photo!

But it was difficult being me in my small Slovakian town. I was a freak to my classmates, and it was hard to find any information about being gay. There was no literature, and no internet.

But I always felt that I was the normal one, and that people around me just didn't understand me.

I told my mother I was gay when I was 19, and she was surprised. Which I didn't understand, because she made this Madonna costume for me!

Today I live with my partner in Prague, Czech Republic. We've been together for
7 years and we are in a registered partnership. My parents love him and treat him like a member of the family. I am now finishing my photography studies in art college, and my thesis is about this part of my childhood.

My message to to LGBTQ kids is to just act naturally.
Don't be shy to show your true orientation, your feelings, or who you love.

Express yourself, don't repress yourself!
___________________________________________________

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Zulema

Zulema, age 7
Phoenix, Arizona (1992)

I've always felt different.
Heck, even my name is different.

My girl crush was always on Angelina Jolie. My first lesbian "experience" was at the age of 19, when I fell in love for the first time with my best friend. That didn't work out and I'm still coping.

Strangely, my siblings are like me:
My two younger brothers and an older sister are gay as well.

We never quite spoke of our sexuality until Facebook came around, and we've became more open about it.

This picture brings me joy because I'm now an artist.
It's true when they say we all have a destiny.
____________________________________________________

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Barry

Barry, age 5
Sherman Oaks, California (1976) 

This was my first time in (public) drag. I always loved to turn my bathrobe into a hula skirt and use my bathrobe tie to make Native American pigtails.

For this circus themed party I wanted to be a clown, who I decided had to look like Bozo.

But I didn't know how to make a Bozo bald skull, so my mom - drag icon that she was to me - helped me create this gypsy fortune teller costume.

In my mind now, I see myself here as a Shirley Temple meets Brooke Shields type of gal. I was stunning.

So stunning in fact, that children and parents at the party were extremely shaken up as I took off my wig to eat a hot dog, as suggested by my friend's mom.


Why would you need to be bewigged to eat? I still wonder about that now! I can still feel the pleasure I got out of freaking everyone out, as I continued to chew.

As an artist and performer today, I still revel in that kind of shock value. I consider myself gay, but I feel that a part of me is transgender. Around that age my mom asked me if I wanted to be a girl, and I said no because of the pain of giving birth. But I secretly wanted to have long hair and run around in frilly dresses.

It turns out my friend in the photo (my friend from kindergarten through high school) is gay too. But we never told each other through the years, as we both came out separately during our college days. __________________________________________________

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Ray

Ray, age 6
St. Louis, Missouri (1980)

By the time of this photo, I already knew I was not the same as the other boys.
As you can see, I have on my Superman suspenders. Though I didn't really understand it then, I was attracted to Superman. I also wanted to be around construction workers, because I found them attractive, too.

Other kids used to call me "Gay Ray." I was not particularly feminine as a child, but the other kids still knew there was something very different about me. This was because of the things I would say, and not being shy about the fact that I enjoyed lots of things typically reserved for girls.

My twin sister used to love to dress me up in her clothes, and we'd run around the neighborhood together. She would introduce me as her "cousin Becky."

While my mother was always very encouraging of me expressing myself, my father was not pleased.

I had a rough childhood. I cried almost every day and was so confused about what was going on with me. This only contributed to the way that I was treated by the other kids and some family members. I used to pray every night, hoping that God would "fix" me. But every morning I woke up the same.

It wasn't until I got into high school that I started making friends with the other outcast kids and punkers. Though life got harder for me in many ways, it always got easier for me to accept myself and to become comfortable with who I am.

Today, I'm still not like the other boys. I'm an artist and musician.
And maybe one day I'll open a little place that I can proudly call "Gay Ray's"
as an homage to my troubled path.
____________________________________________________

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Chris

Chris, age 8
Grayling, Michigan (1998)

This picture really demonstrates what kind of kid I was - lively, goofy, and obviously gay.

I don't really crossdress at all now, but I remember when my family did this as a joke, I felt some part of it seemed right.

It was around this age that I first realized I was different. I was, at the very least, aware that I also liked guys.

Especially Tony, the cute boy in my 3rd grade music class.

However, I didn't come out until I moved out of my home and started college, a process which was well received by all.

Although, it took my parents a bit of time to come around.

Today, I live in Ann Arbor, MI with my wonderful partner of nearly two years, and study Art History at E. Michigan University.

For the kids out there reading this, I say:
Be yourselves, and when you are ready, make the leap.
___________________________________________________

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Steve

Steve, age 3
Waterford, Maine (1969)

I'm sitting here at our campsite on Papoose Pond, wearing my Indian headband with the pink feather in front like a showgirl. Toes gleefully pointed. Smiling.
It's possible this photo was taken at the very moment Judy Garland died.

I was always dressed in red, my towheaded older brother in blue. Later that got switched. Maybe my mother thought I'd attract less attention in blue.

I was a good student with plenty of friends, until my town merged with another in junior high. Kids I hadn't grown up with tormented me. The dreaded F word. Some old friends jumped ship and unfriended me. I tried fitting in for about a minute, but this was classic rock country, and I liked Blondie and The B-52's.

I told my girlfriend I was gay. She told me she was a lesbian. Other friends I told were cool with it. In high school the artsy upperclassmen protected me, and the worst was over by about 16. I didn't come out to my parents until after college. Mom wasn't surprised, but Dad laughed and said he never would've known.

When I moved to Hollywood there were gay people everywhere. I became a noted drag performer (the original Sharon Needles) and made fabulous friends. I wore red unless I'd bleached my hair, in which case I'd wear blue.

And I loved my big gay demimonde.

After I moved back east to be near my dying father, there were some unhappy years. The bar and the after party are the wrong place to grieve. Happily,
I bounced back, and I'm grateful for my life today.

Being gay doesn't define me. I'm much more than just that.
But looking at this picture now, I absolutely love it. That's the real me.

And I want to keep that kid smiling, and maybe give him another feather.

Steve's first, famous person same-sex crush:
Ralph Carter (Michael on "Good Times")
_____________________________________________________

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Saxon

Saxon, age 6
Tulsa, Oklahoma (1995)

Going through my fathers' pictures for his 50th birthday, I came across this one. It was taken at my grandmother's house in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

I had the best memories there, hanging out at the lake with my dad, and just being a crazy kid.

I'm 22 now, and a working performance artist. As this picture shows, I had a flair for the dramatic at an early age!

Looking back, I don't consider myself overly flamboyant.

I just had an amazing support system, so I didn't care about the perceptions of others.

And I must say, I couldn't have asked for a better childhood.

AND IT JUST GETS BETTER!
______________________________________________________

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Dean

Dean, age 4
Hollywood, Florida (1975)

This picture was taken on Halloween when I was in kindergarten. My sister was 10-years old when I was born, and had always wanted a baby sister. Having two brothers already, my sister had her heart set that I was going to be a girl.

On my birthdate, my mom sent my three siblings off to school, and said that when they got home, they would have a new baby brother or a baby sister.

Well, you can imagine my sister's devastation! It wasn't long before my sister realized that I fit into her dolls' clothing, and she could make me the little sister she always wanted!

I knew I was gay around age 5 or 6.
I remember staring at my sister's boyfriend's Speedo at the water park,
and just knowing that I was different.

At times I thought my life would've been easier if I had been born a girl.

Back in the 1970's, I think the majority of us grew up in an "Archie Bunker" like atmosphere. As for my parents, they were never afraid of using the N word, and were not shy about talking about "the Queers" that lived on the next block.

I remember cringing every time they would start to talk about them, knowing that one day my truth had to come out. That, or I was going to have to run away from home to a place like Pleasure Island from "Pinocchio."

I live in Hollywood, CA now and work as a very successful makeup artist. I've worked on people like Beyonce, Lady Gaga, and Mariah Carey to just name a few. And I am living the life I always dreamed of! I look back on the small stuff now and laugh, because I remember it seeming to be so all-consuming.

For the LGBTQ youth of today, I say:
Follow your dreams and don't change who you are!
Life does get better. It gets as good as you want it to!

Dean's first, famous-person same sex crush:
John Schneider ("Dukes of Hazzard")
_________________________________________________

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Steven

Steven, age 4
Carlsbad, California (1969)

I was born in Oklahoma. My mom was 2nd generation Sicilian and my dad was from Missouri. My sister remembers this as her baton-twirling costume. I don't remember wearing it, but I'm sure my mom thought it was harmless and funny.

I remember as early as this age, that
I loved feminine things, art, and playing "doctor" with my cute neighbors. I guess I was very curious and cute myself, because I remember older boys flirting with me.

I was in chorus and the band, like many of us back then. But I also remember being the only boy to choose
"disco class" over football in Jr. High.

And, my mother said my father "always knew."

As a young teen, "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" played at the local theater. I went done up as Frank N. Furter and dethroned the person playing him. I realized that if I was performing, I was more powerful.
I was always misstaken for older, because my makeup was so fabulous.

Then the 80's arrived, and I soon discovered Hollywood and other out-of-the-closet gay teens. The Odyssey club in West Hollywood was an under-18 disco,
and I had my first gay kiss there. My look was compared to Marc Almond from
Soft Cell. We all loved Boy George and the freedom to cross gender barriers.
 

In 1985 I moved to New York City and quickly became part of the night life.
Drag culture had taken over Manhattan night clubs, so I added tits to my new romantic looks, and eventually morphed into a drag queen.

Within a year, I was hired by Patricia Field as a stylist. I also won a drag contest at The Boy Bar club, as Miss Perfidia 1986. I lived with established drag performers who trained me well, and I took my show all over the world .

My crowning achievement as a drag performer is seen in "Wigstock: The Movie," which really showcased NYC as it was back then. My Perfidia's Wig World shop is featured in the movie, as well as my performance.

My interest and talent with wigs eventually lead to Broadway. My designs were seen in "The Pee Wee Herman" show on Broadway for HBO and I was also responsible for the wigs seen in the cult TV classic, "Strangers With Candy."

Most currently, I am styling for "Hedwig On Broadway."

Good times!
xo Steven / Miss Perfidia
___________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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Martin

Martin, age 4

Orlando, Florida (1980)

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but I think this picture is worth one word: queer. To be completely honest, I don't remember the moment this photo was taken while we were visiting Disneyworld. I do however, remember quite clearly, that as a child I was intrigued by all things glamorous.

Through the innocent eyes of a little Latino gay boy, what's more glamorous than a 6 ft 3 mouse-woman - in a red and white polka dot dress, with super luscious eyelashes, giant yellow pumps, and puffy white gloves? The answer is nothing.

Nothing is more fabulous than Minnie Mouse and her trademark blue
eye-shadow. NOTHING!

The 4-year old Martin, almost instinctively, already knew this to be true. And I think it can be safely said that Minnie Mouse was my first drag queen sighting.

When I look at this picture, I imagine time traveling back to the year 1980. Then I picture grown-up Martin standing in front of tiny Martin, and hugging him and telling him that everything will be okay. And my heart breaks for the difficulty that awaits this sensitive and creative kid.

What I see here is a little boy who is trying to figure out how a fabulous glove was stitched so perfectly. And when I look at this photo, I also wonder how my father could have been disappointed? This is a child with imagination!

He wants to make music and wonderful things and draw lovely pictures.
And so what if he punches like a girl? This boy deserves love.

If I were to show you the uncropped image, you'd also see my mother and my sister. But to me, this moment is not about my family. This moment is about Martin and Minnie. Two souls that understand each other.

This moment is about a gay boy's bliss. He is still unaware of ridicule and discrimination. He is still innocent. He is in love with the construction of a fabulous costume. He seems to know the power of artifice.

And he isn't ashamed quite yet.

Martin's first, famous-person same sex crush:
He-Man, The Most Powerful Man in the Universe
________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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Grant

Grant, age 4

Bay Area, California (1969)

In 1968, I was "The Flying Nun" for Halloween, as I was obsessed with her TV show. Everyone had a big laugh over the boy in a dress! But being so young,
I really didn't understand what all the fuss was about.

I kept wearing my magical dress for playtime, all the way through here, in the summer of '69. I started to sense that I was different from anyone I knew.

By the time I was 12, it dawned on me that I was gay. And I felt that if anyone found out about my attraction to boys, I would be utterly destroyed. I desperately did whatever it took to seem straight, like dating girls and playing football, etc.

By the time I was 25, I was like a dam with a thousand cracks in it, and I finally came out to my friends and family. They were all totally supportive, but it was tough for my parents at first. 

They came around though, and my dad ended up happily walking me down the aisle when I got married to my man, 4 years ago.

Today, I couldn't be happier with my amazing husband (we've been together for 7 years), our 2 dogs, and my job as an illustrator in New York.

If you feel alienated, or having trouble accepting who you are - hang in there! There is no "normal," and what you're trying to hide or suppress now, will soon become one of your greatest gifts. And a source of strength.

Just like that little boy in the nun dress, be true to yourself.
And you will learn to fly, too!

Grant's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Glen Campbell (singer)
___________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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