Terry

Terry, age 7
Mt. Sterling, Ohio (1968)

My mom was a big supporter of Santa Claus. Actually, it wasn’t until the first Christmas after she got married (at age 17, and Santa didn’t come) that she learned the truth. But despite that knowledge and a short, rocky marriage, she instilled in my brother and I the confidence that we could ask Santa for whatever we really, truly wanted. If Santa could afford it, that’s what he’d bring.

I think my older brother was on to mom and started working the system.
But I believed in the man who didn’t judge me wholeheartedly.

All our Christmas photos show the clear difference between my brother and I: He’d get a rifle, and I’d get a pogo stick with pink tassels on the handle bars.
Santa kept me stocked with dolls and even a patent leather purse once.

Here’s a photo of the year I scored both a dollhouse and an E-Z Bake Oven. Santa (and his helper) never disappointed, except that my mom didn’t have a lot of time to pull off all this magic.

So we were raised with the slogan, “Santa doesn’t wrap.”

Thus, anything from the North Pole was laid out under the tree in it’s original box. But it was fine. My brother and I had no trouble figuring out which present belonged to who.

And although I was teased and tormented throughout my school years for being a sissy, I always knew Santa was my safe haven.

 I just didn’t know to thank my mom for that until much later in life.
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Nancy

Nancy, age 5
Columbus, Ohio (1961)

I was definitely a tomboy when I was young. My favorite activities were building tree houses, playing in the woods, reading adventure stories, riding my bike and playing kick ball. I hated playing with dolls, especially Barbies!

As you can see in my photo, I loved wearing comfortable, functional pants with lots of big pockets - and I still do!

My first crush on a girl was in the 6th grade, but she wasn't particularly interested in me.

Soon after that I started having boyfriends, because I had no clue that having a girlfriend was even an option.

At that time, all you saw on the television were white, straight folks.

When I was 16, I visited my cousin at his college. For lack of anything better to do, we went to a panel discussion put on by the Gay Activist Alliance. There were two women and one guy on the panel. And that experience was like a big lightbulb that went on in my head.

I spent the next 7 years looking for other lesbians, while still dating guys.
As soon as I found my first girlfriend, I gave up dating guys immediately.

It took my family a couple of years to get used to the fact that I am a lesbian.
But that was over 30 years ago!

Since then, I gave birth to a beautiful daughter (using artificial insemination), have had a great career, and been involved with my wife for 16 years.
We eventually got married in Massachusetts.

So for all you young folks reading this, listen up:
It does get better and you can have it all!
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Noah

Noah, age 5
West Milton, Ohio (1999)

When I look back now, I think, “Well, no duh - I’m gay!” I can recall buying my first Green Day CD, with a recurring fantasy where singer Billie Joel Armstrong and I run away together. I was young so I never had a sexual attraction to him. But for some reason the fantasy made me feel safe.

When I played with my Lego people I only had one girl, so many of those toy pairings were gay.

But I never really realized exactly what I was doing.

My best friend since I was age 1 turned out to be homophobic, and I repeatedly defended the gay community when he claimed that all gay people were going to hell.

Yet I could never bring myself to identify as gay myself. I knew it was there, but I just did not recognize it.

I can recall my parents finding gay porn on the computer two times and having a conversation with a boy on MySpace when I was 12. But when I came out four years later, they seemed surprised.

My first boyfriend was one of my best friends and we are still close today. I have taken guys to every school dance since I came out, and fortunately I've survived high school without too much bullying.

It certainly was not easy sailing, though, and I had many nights where I cried, ready to swallow a handful of pills and end it all. I'm sure glad I didn't!

And today, I am thankful that I am gay.

Being out has even brought my dad and me closer. I'll talk to him about boys while we work on his car together. It is completely ironic, but it's home.

PS: 12 years after my photo was taken, I made out with a boy in that same van. :)
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Stuart

Stuart, age 6 
Shaker Heights, Ohio (1969) 

I've known I was different from the first moments of my self awareness. I came from a mixed marriage that turned into a violent household. My father's family was Jewish and I never felt that I was part of that community. I always felt safe with my mother's family, who lived in a small town in Central Ohio.

Until I was age 5, I was pretty much a rough and tumble boy.
I was obsessed with playing with cars, riding my bike, and doing everything else that boys did.

The only real love that I received was from Leatrice, a woman my father hired to help with house cleaning. I adored her, and she was my world.

My first inkling I was gay was around age 4, watching Batman and hoping his costume would rip open. I can't explain it, but each episode I hoped it would happen. Of course it never did, but I never stopped hoping.

I later found copies of my father's Playboy Magazines and tried to will myself to find those women attractive. But when we would be at a pool, I was obsessed with the men in their swim suits and seeing their chests.

I became very body conscious at a very young age, and became painfully shy around other guys. I was skinny and didn't like to fight. I hated gym class because I thought I would get a hard-on in the locker room and would be made fun of.

My home life was violent and unpredictable, and I had no safe haven.
And I was bullied in school. I was beaten up. And I was called a fag.

The "normal" people in suburban Ohio in those days did not acknowledge gay people. I had no mentor, no one to look to for guidance. I just wanted to die and be wiped from the face of the Earth, because I feared I would shame the family.

My coming out happened in January 1983. I saw that gay men were just like everyone else, and we were everywhere and doing everything that "normal" people did. And I also understood that when you hide who are you, you give total power to the negative people around you.

While it took me 20 years to get there - and everyone's journey is different - it was such a relief! And the reward? I made it. And I made my now-deceased parents both understand that they didn't "do this to me," but that I am who I am, and that I was born this way.

My partner and I have known each other for 32 years and we've been together for 16 years. And all of those years have been warm, loving, and supportive.

We live in amazing times, and its so good to be here and see how the world is getting better and better for LGBT people.
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Allison

Allison, age 3
Cleveland, Ohio (1993) 

I was always lusting after my brother's LEGO blocks. But as he was almost six years older, he was not keen on sharing them with me. So imagine my delight when I unwrapped my very own LEGO set for Christmas! I do remember being mildly upset that my box was pink instead of red. I liked red as a bold color.

I loved climbing trees and going for long "excursions" with the local boys along the creek behind my house.

But I also loved getting dolled up in dresses for special occasions, and I didn't mind that my Christmas pajamas were frilly.

Or that my mother refused to let me paint my room dark blue.

The first time I noticed my sexuality was in the 6th grade, when I was simultaneously in love with my best friend (a girl) and a boy in my homeroom.

I knew then that I was "different" and that I should pick which gender I would like for the rest of my life. But I didn't want to. I knew about gay people, but I didn't know there were other options besides just "gay" and "straight".

I had and still have massive crushes on Ryan Reynolds (and Ryan Gosling), Eliza Dushku, and Alison Hannigan. As far as Alison is concerned, her role on "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" is all I need to say!

Unfortunately, my biggest bully is my own brother. He took out his own anger on me and knew that mocking my tomboy behavior was a sour spot for me.

One time he nonchalantly said, "I bet you're a lesbian." I asked him what he meant, but he wouldn't answer. I thought a lot about it though. We aren't on speaking terms and because of this and other family factors, I spent my first Christmas with just my partner, despite my family living 5 minutes away.

I pledged a sorority in college and got kicked out for being who I am. But I don't regret coming out. I do regret dropping out because of the resulting severe depression and lack of motivation causing confusion and turmoil in my head.

I eventually made a great group of friends and met my wonderful partner. I have always maintained that I like both genders, and though I do not deny that there should not be distinction between the genders, I'll admit that I like my men manly and my women at least mildly feminine.

I have to constantly remind myself and my lovely wife that things do get better, and even now things are better than they were a year ago, or the year before that.

So my message for LGBTQ kids today is: Just keep your head up.
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Scott

Scott, age 7
Dayton, Ohio (1976)

I was doing financial paperwork the other day, and it reminded me how in the 2nd grade, I was taught to draw what was allegedly a "proper" number "2".

The same teacher would also read our "writing" homework out loud for the entire class.

If she disliked your sentences, she would sing her opinion in this imperious, operatic voice:

"Booooorrriiiiinnnnnggggg!"

Well, being the creative creature I am, I decided to write my number 2's with a "wavy swoosh" at the bottom.

She berated me for it in front of the class, and it went like this:


Teacher: "Is this how I told you to write your 2's?"
Me: "No."
Teacher: "Then why didn't you write them the way I told you to?"
Me: "Because your way is [singing at the top of my lungs] "BBBBBOOOOOOORRRRRRIIIIIINNNNNNGGGG!"

I went to the Principal's office for that one, who couldn't stop laughing about it.
And today, I still write my number 2's with the swoosh.
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Thomas

Thomas, age 2
Toledo, Ohio (1992)

I should ask Tyra Banks for my check, as I was clearly smiling with my eyes first! I was the boy that wanted to be the mom when playing house. I was the boy in your daughter's room playing with her Barbies, who turned your bed comforter into a Haute couture gown, and who performed "Proud Mary" for a talent show.

I argued why I wasn't supposed to do these things, because I was born this way.

Growing up, I got a lot of complaints about my "girly interest" from family and friends.

I just didn't care for sports or G.I. Joe dolls. Well, if G.I. Joe was cute, then I cared.

I didn't believe I was gay until the day I hugged one of my kindergarten classmates naked, while we were changing at the pool. I remember my first kiss was with a boy while playing with Hot Wheels.

But as I got older, I started to experience plenty of bullying. It wasn't any better going to an all-boy high school. I was teased, beaten up, pranked, and even had Facebook hate pages in my honor.

It all took its toll on me.
The self-hate I had for my sexuality manifested through over-eating.

At a heavy 286lbs, I started to see that I couldn't please anyone but myself.
But now at 21, I've lost over 130lbs. And I am back to being that same little boy who doesn't care about the person everyone else wants me to be.

To the many gays out there reading this who are struggling with acceptance, trust - it always gets better. People will respect you for who you are no matter what. But, you've got to fight for yourself.

Thomas' first, famous-person same sex crush:
Lil Bow Wow
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Robert

Robert, age 3
Cleveland, Ohio (1955)

This picture was, and still is, the real me. I have always been a record collector.
I am 59, African-American, and GAY.

I was mostly OK until Kindergarten.

My teacher there told my father that I liked to play with the girls and their dolls. He told me, 'Boys do not play with dolls' and he did not like that at all. So, he taught me "boy stuff," like throwing a football.

The next trials came when I went to Junior High School. The other boys did not want me on their teams. I was called a sissy by most of them.

My 8th grade teacher asked me, 'Robert, are you a faggot?'

The other boys at that time called me "Rob-Butt" and there was also bullying and ridicule from the older, larger boys. So, I kept to myself. It wasn't as bad when I got to High School. Most of the boys had failed their classes, and I graduated at 17.

I told my parents that I am gay when I was 19. My father took it as a failure on his part. But I told him it had nothing to do with him. My mother thought I would grow out of it, but I have not. I have been out and proud since I was 19, and was even in the Marine Corps Reserve Program.

The reason I like this blog, is that everyone says it gets better - and it does!
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Darcy

Darcy, age 3
New Philadelphia, Ohio (1987)

As a kid, I was a little odd. I liked girly things to an extent. I was okay with dresses, but not jewelry. I liked dolls, but I preferred crafty creative endeavors more. I guess it was kind of telling that when playing with Barbie dolls, I always had two Barbies living together, with no Ken around. Ken was just not interesting or necessary to me.

I loved Punky Brewster. She was
one of my early role models/loves. The Spice Girls were a major obsession, too. I had a new favorite member every few weeks.

And Gwen Stefani in the No Doubt days was the love of my life.

All these fierce women plastered my bedroom walls in high school.

Sadly, I got teased pretty badly in high school. I was called a slut, a dyke, a freak.

I cut off all my hair in 10th grade, and wore crazy thrift store clothes.

That probably didn't help much, but
I liked looking that way.

I always kissed girls but dated guys, and I tried really hard to make those relationships work.

I thought there was something wrong with me, as I was so unhappy. I spent years in therapy and on medication, thinking I was somehow essentially broken and would never find that spark of joy in my life. I drank heavily and used drugs and hated myself.

Finally, now, at age 27, I have the most amazing, beautiful girlfriend I could ever ask for. I finally feel like the missing piece has been found.

I also learned there was never anything wrong with me. I was just trying to fit into a place that wasn't meant for me. I don’t know what my future holds, but I finally found happiness. And I know I'm just fine exactly the way I am.

Darcy's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Soleil Moon Frye (as "Punky Brewster")
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Jamie

Jamie, age 11

Whitehall, Ohio (1977)

This picture shows one of my last years trick-or-treating in costume. And I have no idea what prompted me to dress in drag. As an adult, I have no affinity for that. But I look a LOT like my mother in that getup.

From the age of about 4,
I knew I was different.

I loved "Wonder Woman," "Charlie's Angels" and "Three's Company."And ABBA.

After quickly learning the word "sissy," I also learned that it was BAD, and that it somehow applied to me.

I did everything I could to "butch up" and tried to cast aside anything girly or frilly.

This was kind of okay, as I loved trucks and cars, too.

So it wasn't hard to fake it.

I was uncoordinated and hated sports, so it was a struggle to "keep it in the closet." Fortunately, my straight brother was as uncoordinated and as unconventional as I was.

My mom had sussed me out, but we never admitted it to each other until I was 30. I knew, however, I was gay by the time I was 14. And after having attributed my feelings to "envy" before that.

I found this picture embarrassing for years. But I like it now.

Jamie's first, famous-person same sex crushes:

Lee Majors, Jameson Parker, & Parker Stevenson
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Colin

Colin, age 4

Dayton, OH (1964)

I'm the the youngest of 7 children, in an Irish Catholic family in Dayton Ohio. As far back as I can remember, my mother made sure that I knew I was special.

I can remember the day of this picture very clearly. I had dressed up all by myself upstairs, and was so proud of it, I descended the stairs to show the family.

Don't mistake the look on my face for sadness. It was more just disappointment at my family's initial reaction, when they first saw me coming down the stairs.

I was looking for admiration or awe at the "ensemble" I'd created out of diverse items I'd found in a closet.

My family laughed and took this picture. But I remember feeling like royalty,
as I descended down those stairs.

This picture now rests on our mantle, next to a childhood picture of my husband. His photo is from when he was around 6-years old. In it, he's holding a can of worms for fishing, and he looks so happy.

I guess the old saying that "opposites attract" holds true.
And we have been together for over 28 years now.

My message to all is:

Never, ever let anyone make you feel less than the wonderfully special human being that you are! You are FABULOUS!

Dain

Dain, age 4

Akron, OH (1967)

I love this photo. I'm the "nurse" on the right. I have carefully tended to my soldier-brother's wounds, and then we proudly posed for a photo in front of the ugliest couch in the world.

I knew I was different from a very early age. I loved drawing and dolls and imagination games and reading.

My brother loved sports, and being particularly loud. And also, it seems, wearing bowling shoes.

My incredible parents let us each be exactly who were were, and they were clearly willing to document it! 

Being surrounded by love and support, I have grown to be a very happy, successful gay man.

I'm blessed.

Bryan

Bryan, age 8

Bolivar, Ohio (1984)

Lawrence of Arabia?  Nope, it's me Bryan - in one of the costumes my grandma brought back from her travels. I wore this outfit so often, she once told me once she'd have to go back overseas to get another! In fact, it was rare for me not to be in costume: cowboy, air force, king, preacher, etc. One time, I dressed up my favorite action hero in a hoop dress, and I'd enter into another world.

My mom, who had good intentions, often tried to "man me up" by throwing balls at me. I never could catch a baseball.

The musical "Annie" was the soundtrack to my early life. Indeed, at times I felt like an orphan.

I felt, who could understand me? Most times I didn't even understand myself!

I always knew I was different, but I didn't always know why.

One night as a young teen, my family was watching Donahue on TV. There was a gay couple on the show, and I innocently inquired as to what was happening.

My dad answered back to me: "If you ever want to try something like that, you should let me know." Why? He said he would, quote: "Take me out in back of the barn and put me out of my misery."

Years later, before my dad's passing in 2008, he was working as a security officer at a local hospital. He was on a suicide watch, and the man he protected was gay. I'm told that dad, a man of relatively few words, counseled him: "I know things seem bad now. I have a gay son. He went through the same rollercoaster ride. He just got married to his partner. Things will get better. I promise."

And they do!  Things do get better! I married my partner in 2008, and we adopted 3 dogs and a cat.  We're thinking about adopting human kids now, too.

I barely made it to this point, but life has worked itself out in unexpected ways!
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Jarryd

Jarryd, age 3

Loveland, OH (1983)

When I came across this photo in a family album, the first thing that comes to mind is: Oh, the 80's! A mohair patterned sofa AND wood paneling? Obviously a truly dark time for interior design.

With that said, it's time the world knows that I would have kept that handbag if I'd known how truly fierce I looked. And the storage inside? Amazing. I mean, that bag carried all of my necessities: sunglasses, Chapstick, breath mints, and of course My Little Pony (I only wish I was exaggerating).

I got the idea for carrying the handbag around and wearing those shades from watching soap operas while home with my mother. What can I say? Those ladies had style to die for. I also feel inclined to share this: you can't really see in the photo, but I totally had my nails painted pearlized pink. I can thank my grandmother for that one. I wanted them done and she did them.

My two favorite films growing up were "Hocus Pocus" (I saw it 12 times in the theater) and "Sleeping Beauty." My mom had to buy two copies of that, just so she could rewind one, while the other one played. God help you if it wasn't ready!!! As for Maleficent? True love.

You hear the same story time after time: "Growing up I always knew." As a kid, it wasn't just me that knew. EVERYONE knew I was different.

However, I was lucky enough to have a family that supported me right from the start, and never once tried to hold me back. When I finally 'came out' at 17, they had prepared themselves far in advance for that inevitable conversation.

It was still one of the hardest things I've EVER had to say to someone.
But each time you say it, you get a little wiser, and a little stronger. 

Go Forth! Come Out — it's one of the best things you can do for yourself.

Jarryd's first, famous-person same sex crush:

"Marky Mark" Wahlberg
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Kevin

Kevin, age 4

Akron, Ohio (1959)

Here, my older sisters dressed me up in their clothes, put me up front, and my dad took this picture. Looking back, a couple of things strike me about it. First, sisters are probably always wanting to dress up something or someone, like dolls or brothers, but most 3-year-old boys wouldn't allow it. Second, I struck a pose that gives it all away. I'm thankful my dad found the camera and actually took the picture, without protesting or objecting.

And notice my sisters weren't dressed nearly as pretty as I was!


I first knew I was "different" at 3-years old. I have a vivid memory of being in the back of my dad's '55 Buick station wagon, and seeing a really old man sitting on the ground in front of a building in downtown Akron, Ohio.

For some reason, I knew he had something I lacked, and I wanted it from him before he died. Turns out, that something I was missing was heterosexuality. That's a big word for a small kid, and I'm not saying that I knew exactly what was going on at that moment. But I do know that I felt different than my dad, brothers, or other men in general.

It was a sad moment for me, but it was the beginning of my knowing and understanding myself. I always knew down deep that I was different or gay, but I finally came out to myself and others at age 25.

And now, my life is good. I have a partner of 7 years, and 2 sons I adopted as infants, who are now 12 and 10 years old. I am out at work and everywhere I go. I don't believe in the closet - it's too stressful.

If others don't like me because I am gay, that's their problem. I already went through the self-acceptance process long ago -- starting with this picture of me in a dress!!!

Kevin's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Don Grady (Robbie on "My Three Sons")

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Paul

Paul, age 4

Grove City, Ohio (1984)

My childhood dream was to be Snow White. Although I couldn't whistle, I regaled everyone with my version of "Whistle While You Work," and raised some eyebrows waltzing through the house singing "Someday My Prince Will Come."

I also started channeling my creative energy into another outlet: drawing. My parents sought the mentoring of a local artist, who took me under her wing when I was 4, and she taught me that anything I imagined could come to life on canvas.

Soon, every wall in our house was covered with oil-painted tributes to my favorite heroines. I then decided that I didn’t want to be Snow White when I grew up. I wanted to be an artist.

I'm grateful I had a mentor who cared enough to fuel this creative flame, because the other flaming aspects of my personality presented problems at school.

Boys with high-pitched voices - whose approach to running laps in gym class could be described as "prancing" - didn’t fare well. I learned that in order to survive, I had to conceal those aspects of my personality that made me different.

I wasn't able to describe what I was covering up as "gay" yet, though. That realization didn’t fully hit me until right after college. Still, I knew there was something inside me that needed to be squelched, or it would ruin everything.

Fortunately, this is a fairy tale with a happy ending.

I found my way out of the dark, enchanted forest to a place of self-acceptance.
I even found my own handsome prince, and our life together is as close to "happily ever after" as I can imagine, this side of the Magic Kingdom

I've also continued pursuing my dream to be an artist. My paintings that explore my journey out of the closet are displayed in galleries across the country.

Art was my salvation during the most difficult parts of my childhood, and I encourage others who struggle with similar issues to find a way to creatively express themselves.

Paul's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Prince Charming ("Snow White")
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Nathan

Nathan, age 7

Saint Paris, OH (1992)

Here I am, 7-years old at the County Fair, and throwing some shade to the camera. I grew up on a farm in rural Ohio.

I always knew I was different. I always loved playing with my sister's Barbies,
My Little Pony, and Rainbow Brite dolls.

I remember being teased and taunted for being gay, before I even really knew what being gay meant.

Back then, I loved dancing to Michael Jackson.
And now, this picture makes me smile : )

Nathan's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Cary Elwes (in "The Princess Bride")

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David

David, age 5

Mt. Vernon, OH (1970)

This is me, Little David, from Mt. Vernon, Ohio - birthplace of Paul Lynde!

"Drying my hair with The Joy of Cooking"

I LOVED this hairdryer and used it whether my hair needed drying or not. It was like having a big, yellow, warm 'n sunshiney, electric hat on my head. I'm pretty sure that the book in my lap is "The Joy of Cooking" and I'm pretending to read.

I always felt different. I was always "too sensitive" and I didn't have many friends. And the few friends I did have were girls, not boys.

David's first, famous-person same sex crushes:

Freddie (on "Scooby Doo")

Aqua-Man, Davey Crockett, & Davy Jones ("The Monkees")

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