October 22, 2011


Thomas, age 2
Toledo, Ohio (1992)

I should ask Tyra Banks for my check, as I was clearly smiling with my eyes first! I was the boy that wanted to be the mom when playing house. I was the boy in your daughter's room playing with her Barbies, who turned your bed comforter into a Haute couture gown, and who performed "Proud Mary" for a talent show.

I argued why I wasn't supposed to do these things, because I was born this way.

Growing up, I got a lot of complaints about my "girly interest" from family and friends.

I just didn't care for sports or G.I. Joe dolls. Well, if G.I. Joe was cute, then I cared.

I didn't believe I was gay until the day I hugged one of my kindergarten classmates naked, while we were changing at the pool. I remember my first kiss was with a boy while playing with Hot Wheels.

But as I got older, I started to experience plenty of bullying. It wasn't any better going to an all-boy high school. I was teased, beaten up, pranked, and even had Facebook hate pages in my honor.

It all took its toll on me.
The self-hate I had for my sexuality manifested through over-eating.

At a heavy 286lbs, I started to see that I couldn't please anyone but myself.
But now at 21, I've lost over 130lbs. And I am back to being that same little boy who doesn't care about the person everyone else wants me to be.

To the many gays out there reading this who are struggling with acceptance, trust - it always gets better. People will respect you for who you are no matter what. But, you've got to fight for yourself.

Thomas' first, famous-person same sex crush:
Lil Bow Wow

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Daddy Squeeze Me! said...


Unknown said...

Tyra would TOTALLY sue Thomas!