Reidar

Reidar, age 7
Seattle, Washington (1975)

Just a submission of me on my 7th birthday. I loved my Big Josh doll, who was a friend of Big Jim.

Our parents would usually try to get my brother and I similar gifts.

As our birthdays are just days apart,
Big Josh was my present.

Even though I had no idea what gay was back then, I knew I really liked that doll.....er....."action figure" a lot.

And I think my pic sure shows it. LOL!

My message to youth is:
Be yourself. The world today is a better place because of diversity.
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Reese

Reese, age 5

Bellingham, WA (1991)

I knew I was gay when I was 5-years old. I remember having a crush on a fellow 5-year old classmate named Dustin, and I remember how hard I cried when he moved away just before 1st grade started.

I was only able to rebound, because of my (secret) crush on Speed Racer, as well as my obsession with the fierce yellow jumpsuit worn by Ms. April O'Neil from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, perhaps my first gay icon.

I also remember my love of the "hand on the hip" pose, as is evident in the pic. If anything, looking back on photos of me like this makes me remember how un-self-conscious I was when so young.

Once I hit 5th grade, things changed. That's when the bullying started, the name-calling, the getting my ass kicked after school, etc. etc. etc. All those things that so many of us have to deal with.

Things got easier in my later high school years, but once graduation hit, I packed up and got the hell out of my small town. I moved to nearby Seattle, where I still reside.

My parents were always supportive of me, but there's one memory in particular that sticks out to me, as the first moment that my mother truly offered her love and support to me, without being too mushy.


Mom and I used to sit on the couch, eat popcorn and Doritos, and watch "Melrose Place" together when I was about 7-years old. There was a gay character on the show, a doctor portrayed by Doug Savant. In one episode, he kisses another man, or it's implied that they've had sex or something.

I remember when the episode ended and the credits were rolling, my mom turned to me and said: 'Reese, that character is gay. And that's okay.'

For anyone who feels like an outsider now:

Don't let the bullies win, always be yourself, and don't hesitate in contacting a GLBT group or Gay/Straight Alliance for support.

Someone is always out there to help you.
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Brennen

Brennen, age 8

Seattle, WA (1996)

This was shot while shopping for new school clothes, at a visit to the park next door. My 4-year old sister decided it was too warm to wear any clothes at all (hey, we're Scandinavian). Grunge music was huge in Seattle, so my 12-year-old sister was dressed in a plaid button-up. If you saw pictures of her back then, you'd think she grew up to be a lesbian. But there is only one gay in this family.

"Posing as a statue"

I was a latchkey kid of the 90s, so I had little in the way of supervision most days. TV was a big part of me back then: "X Files," "I Love Lucy" reruns on Nick-at-Nite, "Singled Out" on MTV , and "Goddess Kring" on Seattle's public access channel. She's a local, late-night icon of sorts, infamous for her on-air acid trips, poetry, and naked, glittered body.

"Daria," "Beavis & Butthead," and "South Park" were other favorites. My family connected to the Internet in 1998, and I took to it like a duck to water. Let's just say that there were very few safeguards for children on AOL then - and leave it at that.

I've always known I was different. My only friends were girls and adults, and I distinctly remember complaining that the Power Rangers were "too violent" when the other boys talked about it in class. My dad "encouraged" (read: forced) me to play softball, but I'd sit on the sidelines with my friend Megan, waiting for the donuts and apple juice after the game.

I never really equated my being different to anything more than a personal quirk, and I've always been awkward. The only difference between being aloof as a kid and aloof as an adult is confidence.

Hot pink was my favorite color, and I loved to draw pictures of chrysanthemums (I was the only 4-year-old who could pronounce chrysanthemum), fuchsias, and my cat Gingersnap. The other day, my mom apologized to me for never letting me buy the hot pink sandals I always wanted as a kid. I also remember furtively snatching the men's underwear ads from Sears and Target out of the recycling bins, but I never really added it all up with the conclusion that I was "gay".

Seattle is a good place to be gay. I was lucky to grow up there, and with the parents I have. When I came out to them at 16, I basically said, 'You probably already figured this out, but...I'm gay'. My parents were surprised (they actually hadn't figured it out), but it changed little about our relationship. In fact, the first thing they said was, 'This doesn't change anything, we still love you.'

For anyone growing up gay today, I'm happy to report that things are only getting better. Be true to yourself; if someone cannot accept you as who you are, they are not worth your time. But it is very rare you will ever meet people like that, I promise!

Brennen's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Danny Roberts (on MTV's "Real World: New Orleans")

Gael Garcia Bernal usurped his throne a year later, and I often wonder if seeing David Duchovny in a Speedo on 'The X Files' could have made me gay.

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