March 23, 2012


Michael, age 3
Connersville, Indiana (1972)

In the 1970's, I would spend quite a bit of time on our covered porch, keeping rhythm with my grandmother in our rocking chairs, and watching the world go by as the sun set.

I wasn't very old, yet I felt right at home being an adult.

I would often tell anyone who asked if I had a girlfriend, that I was a "confirmed bachelor" - even though I didn’t really know what that meant.

It was an adult thing to say and, for some reason, I knew it described me.

One evening, my grandma leaned over and said, "Mickey, I may not be around too much longer, but I want you to know that you are different, you are special. You'll figure it out someday, but don't let anyone ever make you feel bad about yourself. You're loved and always will be."

As I continued to rock, attempting to understand what she meant, I decided that I should just remain quiet and let it sit. I continued to rock, and continued to think about what she meant. I still do.

It wasn't too long as a teen before I knew just how different I really was, and why others might try to make me feel bad about myself. But I like to think that each day, I continue to glean a bit from my grangmother's words.

Today, I still know I am loved and always will be.

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"


aizen999 said...

such a sweet gandma!

Daddy Squeeze Me! said...

This was good and refreshing to hear.

Danny said...

She gave you an amazing gift. Wonderful - thanks for telling us.

Sandra D. said...

Grandmothers are wonderful. Mine really helped make me the person I am today. Your story made me think of her. Thank you.

Kendie said...

Amazing! All we need is acceptance and love!

gertino said...

I must be in a soppy mood tonight as this is the second story that has made me five minutes! Such a vivid scene of you two on the porch and warm words from your Grandma. Thank you :@)

Deanna said...

Hate to call it out, but I remember reading this in "At Least in the City Someone Would Hear Me Scream" by Wade Rouse.

Anonymous said...

While looking up my posting for a friend to view, I read the comments and wanted to thank everyone for the kind words. Deanna, your comment interest me as this was a true and accurate story of myself and my grandmother Harriet. I've not read Wade House' work, but I'm going to have a look now. I appreciate your comment.

saintrage said...

What a beautiful story. Grandparents could be our first contact with angels.