Joshua, age 14
Paradise, California (1993)
As a child, I was generally very quiet and introverted. I always found solace and tranquility in writing rather than involving myself in social activities. But I was active in theater in my early teens and on my high school’s cross country team in my freshman year.
I first came out to my mother at the age of 15. It was pretty rewarding, and my family has always accepted me as a person regardless of differences that may exist between us. As a teenager, I was active in the local LGBT community center, and I have been fortunate that I never have been harassed or singled out for being gay.
During college though, I went back in the closet and I eventually became very religious. As a result of social pressures, I eventually married a woman.
After the birth of our first child, our marriage slowly fell apart. Around the time of our second child, I met a man whom I had brief contact with.
I soon realized I needed to confront my true identity instead of hiding behind a veil of falsehood.
After the birth of our first child, our marriage slowly fell apart. Around the time of our second child, I met a man whom I had brief contact with.
I soon realized I needed to confront my true identity instead of hiding behind a veil of falsehood.
I revealed to my wife the secret that I had been hiding from her for years. She told me she always had known and was willing to accept the fact that I was gay. We came to the understanding that we would have to separate.
I began to turn to close friends and even rabbis for moral support as I began this new phase in my life. Thankfully, I have found nothing but love and support from everybody with whom I have shared this intimate detail of my life.
But today I know that Judaism embraces the gay identity, even with certain prohibitions in regard to particular acts.
The essence of being a gay Jew, however, is acceptable in the eyes of God.
I did not know this for a long time, and had I known it, my adult life would have been much easier.
I did not know this for a long time, and had I known it, my adult life would have been much easier.
But I am happy now and look forward to a beautiful future in which I can celebrate the internal synthesis of all the different aspects of my life.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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