Robert, age 5
White Settlement, Texas (1943)
This was snapped on my first day of school, in a place called "Liberator Village." "Liberators" were bomber war planes made in a factory there, and my tiny Mama crawled inside their wings and welded things.
Back then, kids couldn't start school till after their 6th birthday. But because Mama didn't want me to wait till I was nearly 7 to start, she falsified my birth date so I could start when I was still age 5.
Because I read well, I was quickly promoted to 2nd grade. Although lonely among older kids, I wasn't afraid of school.
One summer, I had lured neighbor boys into the schoolhouse's deeply-recessed doorways to play "You show me yours, I’ll show you mine."
I never had problems about my gayness. Because homosexuality was so feared,
no one ever talked about it or warned me against it. So I wasn't indoctrinated.
Also, I read Sappho, Catullus, Isherwood, and Auden early, and it was actually harder being smart than it was being gay.
I was beat up through high-school for "carrying too many books." Although both straight and gay boys attended my notorious "slumber parties," they were afraid to befriend me in everyday life.
Thus, I lived vicariously through movies and books, and instead of having steady boyfriends, I secretly worshiped movie star Tab Hunter.
Later in life I was alone and maladjusted. I dropped out of college and was thrown out of the Air Force. I fortunately visited New York and wandered into the Caffe Cino, the first Off-Off Broadway Theatre - and the birthplace of gay theatre.
And it was there, at last, that I found artistic, intelligent, gay friends and lovers. Though I was openly gay, I had an international playwrighting career.
It’s somewhat easier being gay today, but things can change in an instant.
Or worse, they can change with an election. So be wise and be wary, kids.
_____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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June 13, 2013
Robert
Labels:
1940's,
artist,
Bob,
born gay,
born this way,
Bullied,
California,
Robert Patrick,
Texas
June 06, 2013
Jim
Jim, age 7
Penticton, British Columbia, Canada (1965)
I've always been gay, and looking back at my photos, I cant figure out why everyone else was surprised. And yes, I'm the boy on the right, hand on my head.
I guess it was because I always had a best "girlfriend" and so people thought there MUST be something going on romantically between us.
I was always "creative" and "whimsical" and I loved to sing and dance.
And I was into everything "artsy."
I was never bullied but still felt I was missing out all through school, as all my friends had boyfriends or girlfriends. I took my guidance counsellor's advice and waited til after high school to come out to my friends.
My mom cried a little when I told her a couple years later, but she assured me that she would always love me. She called back a week later and said she was having a little trouble because she didn't want me to be alone.
I told her I had just met a very cute boy, and he eventually met my mom.
Well, it's 32 years later and we're still together!!!
And it is still getting better and better!
We take nothing for granted and we tell each other 'I love you' everyday.
____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Penticton, British Columbia, Canada (1965)
I've always been gay, and looking back at my photos, I cant figure out why everyone else was surprised. And yes, I'm the boy on the right, hand on my head.
I guess it was because I always had a best "girlfriend" and so people thought there MUST be something going on romantically between us.
I was always "creative" and "whimsical" and I loved to sing and dance.
And I was into everything "artsy."
I was never bullied but still felt I was missing out all through school, as all my friends had boyfriends or girlfriends. I took my guidance counsellor's advice and waited til after high school to come out to my friends.
My mom cried a little when I told her a couple years later, but she assured me that she would always love me. She called back a week later and said she was having a little trouble because she didn't want me to be alone.
I told her I had just met a very cute boy, and he eventually met my mom.
Well, it's 32 years later and we're still together!!!
And it is still getting better and better!
We take nothing for granted and we tell each other 'I love you' everyday.
____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
Labels:
1960's,
born gay,
born this way,
British Columbia,
Canada,
Jim,
Partnered,
Siblings
May 28, 2013
Allison
Allison, age 3
Cleveland, Ohio (1993)
I was always lusting after my brother's LEGO blocks. But as he was almost six years older, he was not keen on sharing them with me. So imagine my delight when I unwrapped my very own LEGO set for Christmas! I do remember being mildly upset that my box was pink instead of red. I liked red as a bold color.
I loved climbing trees and going for long "excursions" with the local boys along the creek behind my house.
But I also loved getting dolled up in dresses for special occasions, and I didn't mind that my Christmas pajamas were frilly.
Or that my mother refused to let me paint my room dark blue.
The first time I noticed my sexuality was in the 6th grade, when I was simultaneously in love with my best friend (a girl) and a boy in my homeroom.
I knew then that I was "different" and that I should pick which gender I would like for the rest of my life. But I didn't want to. I knew about gay people, but I didn't know there were other options besides just "gay" and "straight".
I had and still have massive crushes on Ryan Reynolds (and Ryan Gosling), Eliza Dushku, and Alison Hannigan. As far as Alison is concerned, her role on "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" is all I need to say!
Unfortunately, my biggest bully is my own brother. He took out his own anger on me and knew that mocking my tomboy behavior was a sour spot for me.
One time he nonchalantly said, "I bet you're a lesbian." I asked him what he meant, but he wouldn't answer. I thought a lot about it though. We aren't on speaking terms and because of this and other family factors, I spent my first Christmas with just my partner, despite my family living 5 minutes away.
I pledged a sorority in college and got kicked out for being who I am. But I don't regret coming out. I do regret dropping out because of the resulting severe depression and lack of motivation causing confusion and turmoil in my head.
I eventually made a great group of friends and met my wonderful partner. I have always maintained that I like both genders, and though I do not deny that there should not be distinction between the genders, I'll admit that I like my men manly and my women at least mildly feminine.
I have to constantly remind myself and my lovely wife that things do get better, and even now things are better than they were a year ago, or the year before that.
So my message for LGBTQ kids today is: Just keep your head up.
___________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow this blog with Bloglovin' Tweet
Cleveland, Ohio (1993)
I was always lusting after my brother's LEGO blocks. But as he was almost six years older, he was not keen on sharing them with me. So imagine my delight when I unwrapped my very own LEGO set for Christmas! I do remember being mildly upset that my box was pink instead of red. I liked red as a bold color.
I loved climbing trees and going for long "excursions" with the local boys along the creek behind my house.
But I also loved getting dolled up in dresses for special occasions, and I didn't mind that my Christmas pajamas were frilly.
Or that my mother refused to let me paint my room dark blue.
The first time I noticed my sexuality was in the 6th grade, when I was simultaneously in love with my best friend (a girl) and a boy in my homeroom.
I knew then that I was "different" and that I should pick which gender I would like for the rest of my life. But I didn't want to. I knew about gay people, but I didn't know there were other options besides just "gay" and "straight".
I had and still have massive crushes on Ryan Reynolds (and Ryan Gosling), Eliza Dushku, and Alison Hannigan. As far as Alison is concerned, her role on "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" is all I need to say!
Unfortunately, my biggest bully is my own brother. He took out his own anger on me and knew that mocking my tomboy behavior was a sour spot for me.
One time he nonchalantly said, "I bet you're a lesbian." I asked him what he meant, but he wouldn't answer. I thought a lot about it though. We aren't on speaking terms and because of this and other family factors, I spent my first Christmas with just my partner, despite my family living 5 minutes away.
I pledged a sorority in college and got kicked out for being who I am. But I don't regret coming out. I do regret dropping out because of the resulting severe depression and lack of motivation causing confusion and turmoil in my head.
I eventually made a great group of friends and met my wonderful partner. I have always maintained that I like both genders, and though I do not deny that there should not be distinction between the genders, I'll admit that I like my men manly and my women at least mildly feminine.
I have to constantly remind myself and my lovely wife that things do get better, and even now things are better than they were a year ago, or the year before that.
So my message for LGBTQ kids today is: Just keep your head up.
___________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow this blog with Bloglovin' Tweet
May 18, 2013
Mykel
Mykel, age 4
Macon, Georgia (1996)
I was a very quiet kid. I never liked wearing suits, but I remember loving the setting of this wedding reception I attended with my mother. My signature pose always involved a limp wrist and a protruding pinky. You could say I was your average Bette Midler whenever I walked from room to room.
Growing up I liked girls, but only enough to call them "pretty."
My first attraction to boys occurred by accident when I was age 7. I'd "spied" a classmate of mine more than I should have in a restroom stall, and I couldn't look away.
Barbie dolls were my life, and I was fascinated by the clothes designed for them. I wanted every collector's Barbie, but they were so expensive, I had to make my own.
With a Wonder Woman doll and an ill-fitting black dress with Velcro dots, I made my own Morticia Addams doll.
I always preferred female roles in movies to the point of memorizing their lines.
I even acted out Michelle Pfeiffer's Catwoman character in "Batman Returns."
My first celebrity crush was Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys. The rest didn't compare, and the N*Sync boys didn't stand a chance. Other music I loved included the Spice Girls, S Club 7, and Britney Spears. My mom was already listening to Celine Dion and Shania Twain, so I guess I had it coming.
My mother raised me to be the most polite child imaginable, and everyone around me loved me for it. I didn't have a lot of friends, but the few I had were enough.
And believe it or not, I didn't know I was gay. While I showed signs, I was still, somehow, in a weird state of denial. I didn’t come out to myself until I was 19, and then to my mother by age 20.
Today, I am much more comfortable in my skin now than ever. So my advice to LGBTQ kids is to keep yourself busy in doing what makes you happy.
_____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
Macon, Georgia (1996)
I was a very quiet kid. I never liked wearing suits, but I remember loving the setting of this wedding reception I attended with my mother. My signature pose always involved a limp wrist and a protruding pinky. You could say I was your average Bette Midler whenever I walked from room to room.
Growing up I liked girls, but only enough to call them "pretty."
My first attraction to boys occurred by accident when I was age 7. I'd "spied" a classmate of mine more than I should have in a restroom stall, and I couldn't look away.
Barbie dolls were my life, and I was fascinated by the clothes designed for them. I wanted every collector's Barbie, but they were so expensive, I had to make my own.
With a Wonder Woman doll and an ill-fitting black dress with Velcro dots, I made my own Morticia Addams doll.
I always preferred female roles in movies to the point of memorizing their lines.
I even acted out Michelle Pfeiffer's Catwoman character in "Batman Returns."
My first celebrity crush was Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys. The rest didn't compare, and the N*Sync boys didn't stand a chance. Other music I loved included the Spice Girls, S Club 7, and Britney Spears. My mom was already listening to Celine Dion and Shania Twain, so I guess I had it coming.
My mother raised me to be the most polite child imaginable, and everyone around me loved me for it. I didn't have a lot of friends, but the few I had were enough.
And believe it or not, I didn't know I was gay. While I showed signs, I was still, somehow, in a weird state of denial. I didn’t come out to myself until I was 19, and then to my mother by age 20.
Today, I am much more comfortable in my skin now than ever. So my advice to LGBTQ kids is to keep yourself busy in doing what makes you happy.
_____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
Labels:
1990's,
African-American,
born gay,
born this way,
Dolls,
Georgia,
Mykel
May 07, 2013
Susan
Susan, age 5
Phoenix, Arizona (1959)
My first lesbian experience was at the age of five, with a girl of the same age from my school.
We spent nights at each others homes, and we shared the same bed together during sleep-overs.
I was drawn to her body, and she to mine. There were many passionate (but innocent) nights spent in each others arms.
One day, she disappeared from my life. I really don't know what happened.
I assume that her father, who was in the Air Force, was transferred out of state.
During the ensuing years, I had an affair that lasted several months with an older female cousin, and on and off affairs with several of my girlfriends.
However, the girl that I was most in love with shunned my advances, and she broke my heart. Even so, some fifty years later, we are still friends.
_____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
Phoenix, Arizona (1959)
My first lesbian experience was at the age of five, with a girl of the same age from my school.
We spent nights at each others homes, and we shared the same bed together during sleep-overs.
I was drawn to her body, and she to mine. There were many passionate (but innocent) nights spent in each others arms.
One day, she disappeared from my life. I really don't know what happened.
I assume that her father, who was in the Air Force, was transferred out of state.
During the ensuing years, I had an affair that lasted several months with an older female cousin, and on and off affairs with several of my girlfriends.
However, the girl that I was most in love with shunned my advances, and she broke my heart. Even so, some fifty years later, we are still friends.
_____________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
April 25, 2013
Roger
Roger, age 2
Galt, Ontario, Canada (1963)
Here I am at age 2 on the right, holding the hand of my little sister and best friend. We were inseparable. We played dolls and had little tea parties together. As we grew up we kept to ourselves as our four brothers hung out together.
Five years later we had another sister to play house with. All the while, my dad said "Something ain't right with that boy."
My oldest sister had a beautiful yellow and white dress that I absolutely adored! When I was six I pushed a chair to the closet, climbed up, and took down the dress.
I started to put it on when:
Oh no! The dress got stuck!
My arms were above my head, and I couldn't see and could hardly breathe!
I yelled for help and my mom came and pulled the dress from over my head.
She said, "What are you doing? Boys don't wear dresses!" After I was freed I heard my dad ask, "What is he, some kind of sissy?"
I remember feeling embarrassment and shame. But mostly shame.
My parents started signing me up for sports teams and encouraging me to play with my brothers. That ought to "fix things," they thought. It worked for a while, and I was developing a more "boy-like" attitude and demeanor.
A couple of years later, my sister died. I was devastated and lost. I turned to the church, and my "feminine side" was on its way to being completely buried.
I eventually broke free and have slowly become the person I am now. I still like to wear blouses, skirts, stockings and panties. I feel very much at ease when doing so, but as soon as I put on a dress, I revert back to being that six year-old kid feeling fear, embarrassment, and shame.
But mostly shame...
___________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
Galt, Ontario, Canada (1963)
Here I am at age 2 on the right, holding the hand of my little sister and best friend. We were inseparable. We played dolls and had little tea parties together. As we grew up we kept to ourselves as our four brothers hung out together.
Five years later we had another sister to play house with. All the while, my dad said "Something ain't right with that boy."
My oldest sister had a beautiful yellow and white dress that I absolutely adored! When I was six I pushed a chair to the closet, climbed up, and took down the dress.
I started to put it on when:
Oh no! The dress got stuck!
My arms were above my head, and I couldn't see and could hardly breathe!
I yelled for help and my mom came and pulled the dress from over my head.
She said, "What are you doing? Boys don't wear dresses!" After I was freed I heard my dad ask, "What is he, some kind of sissy?"
I remember feeling embarrassment and shame. But mostly shame.
My parents started signing me up for sports teams and encouraging me to play with my brothers. That ought to "fix things," they thought. It worked for a while, and I was developing a more "boy-like" attitude and demeanor.
A couple of years later, my sister died. I was devastated and lost. I turned to the church, and my "feminine side" was on its way to being completely buried.
I eventually broke free and have slowly become the person I am now. I still like to wear blouses, skirts, stockings and panties. I feel very much at ease when doing so, but as soon as I put on a dress, I revert back to being that six year-old kid feeling fear, embarrassment, and shame.
But mostly shame...
___________________________________________________
Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Tweet
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