June 23, 2011

Noelle

Noelle, age 4
St. Charles, Missouri (1987)

I think that I realized that I was different at a fairly young age. I grew up a "tomboy" that used to melt my sisters' Barbie dolls in the microwave. I loved to play outside and was always in overalls and my saddle shoes.

One of the last times I wore a dress was at an 8th grade dance. I hated dresses and skirts back then. I still do.

Jeans, t-shirts, or a button-down with a tie is about all you'll catch me wearing as an adult.

I didn't actually come out until just a few years ago, when I was 24. Despite having a more than supportive family, for the longest time I kept telling myself that it wasn't true I was gay.

I even thought that the kind of music
I listened to, (primarily heavy rock) would prove that I couldn't be gay.

Not because of fear of not being accepted, but more so that I thought it would make my life difficult. Boy, was I wrong...

Now that I am out, I couldn't be happier about it. I'm very proud of who I am and want younger people to know that things DO GET BETTER.
I was very fortunate to have such an accepting family and amazing friends.

Not everyone is as fortunate. But I know that those people wouldn't change who they are for the world. And if their families don't accept them, then they create their own with the loving people around them. "Family" doesn't necessarily mean blood-related.

The world is changing and people are slowly evolving.
Hang in there and ALWAYS be yourself. Besides, everyone else is taken!

Noelle's first, famous-person same sex crushes:
Jamie Lee Curtis (in "True Lies")
Joyce Hyser (in "Just One of the Guys")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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June 21, 2011

Kellie

Kellie, age 4
Ector, TX (1973)

When I was little, I often wondered how long it would be until I was big enough to drive that tractor. That day I was obviously too little, so I played on it and sang "Delta Dawn" by Helen Reddy. I don't remember doing it, but I know that is the song, because my lovely mother noted it on the back of the picture.


When I was in 2nd grade my teacher called my parents in and told them she thought I was gay. I suppose I was posturing in a way that was too masculine for her liking. I never knew of this accusation, or even what "gay" was at that time. But when I came out in my mid 20's, my mother told me about it.

I had frequent crushes on girls - sometimes my best friend, but not always - mainly starting in high school. I had 3 different boyfriends then and into college, but they just served the purpose of someone to go to events and dances with.

I kept my sexuality under tight wraps until I was in graduate school. The only hard part about coming out was watching my parents cry. And cry, they did.
But they came around a few months later.

Today, I am a completely out gay in a smallish town in Texas. I've been called a dyke on a few dozen occasions. "That's Dr. Dyke to you," I respond, with a smile. I love being gay, and I can't begin to imagine being any other way.

When I look at this photo now, I think about how big that tractor seemed to me back then. As a grown-up, on occasion, I drive much bigger tractors than this.

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

June 20, 2011

Drew

Drew, age 6
Pleasant, PA (1970)

I clearly remember when I was very young, I saw a TV toothpaste commercial, showing a mom, dad, and kids who had no cavities by brushing with Crest. Watching that commercial, I knew in my heart my life would be nothing like that. In other words, a life with no wife, and no kids.

It was scary, because I had no idea what was waiting for me instead. That, in essence, was the story of my childhood. I couldn't imagine what
I was going to grow up to become.

So I read every book I could get my hands on, hoping to find any possible way for me to become a man.

Our mom died just before I turned 4.
But lucky for me, I had a sister, 13-years my senior. She was a gorgeous hippie chick in her mid-20's, with tons of men chasing her.

Every Friday night, she took me out roller skating or to the movies. She was the first person who I came out to at age 17, even though I didn't mean to do that.

She made a point of introducing me to friends of hers who were gay and lesbian. And they were balanced, happy, loved, and loving adults. Slowly, I came to understand that there was, or there would be, a place for me in the adult world.

Today, I live in the California desert with the man I love and our two dogs.
I've had an amazing and wonderful life, and I'm sure that there is more to come.

Alas, though: Despite all the brushing and flossing I do, I have never once in my life gone to the dentist and been free of a cavity.

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

June 19, 2011

Gordon

Gordon, age 5
Caneadea, New York (1959)

Looking at this photo, I have more questions than answers. Who is that man? He looks exactly like my father. And, he looks like a loving dad spending quality time with my sister and me. But, I certainly don't remember him ever doing anything like that. Notice the grumpy look on my face, testifying to the fact that I was coerced into posing for this, when all I wanted to do was to get away.


My mother abandoned us when I was about 10-years old. My father was a spoiled only child who, as an adult, was never around kids until he married late in life, and then we came along. He was never mean or strict, but he was never close or affectionate, either. And he never taught me anything.

But, I can't blame him. He simply didn't know what to do with kids.

Did he know that I was gay? Probably.
But he never said anything, and I never felt the need to say anything myself.

I went to a very small school where I don't remember ever hearing the word, "gay." So, I can look back and be thankful that I was never bullied. In class,
I always sat among the girls, where I felt like I fit in.

I wasn't interested in anything that the boys were talking about.
Not surprisingly, I was terrible at sports and hated gym class.

It's hard to say when it was that I first knew that I was gay. I can remember,
as a young teenager, my attraction to an underwear model whose picture I saw in a catalog. But, I didn't know that my feelings meant anything unusual.

Gordon's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Richard Egan (in "A Summer Place")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow this blog with Bloglovin'