Sonia

Sonia, age 10

E. Hartford, CT (1980)

This was taken at Parrot Jungle in Miami, on a rare visit to see my father.
I remember always liking rainbows. "Mork & Mindy" was a popular TV show when I was a kid, and I'd gotten the same rainbow suspenders that Mork wore, and I'd wear them with a dark green and purple-striped velour jersey top.

"Rainbow Child!"

People in my family would laugh at my fashion choices, as I used to go through phases of wearing only dresses, and alternately only pants.

My first celebrity crush was Olivia Newton-John. After I saw her in "Grease" as the hottie in leather at the end of the movie, I was hooked. Then I got one of her records and would just stare at her for what seemed like hours. I alternately wanted to be her and have her.

Girls were my first loves, then boys when I hit puberty, then back to the girls. Now I confidently identify as queer, and engage in relationships with people whom I find lovable and worthy of my time and attention.

As encouragement to gay kids, I'd say:

Be proud of who you are. Express yourself as best as you can, and find the people who love and support your individuality. Be proud to be different!

And hang in there, as life gets better with age and experience. Be strong, be kind, and be gentle with yourself. You are lovable and precious. Celebrate!

Sonia's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Olivia Newton-John
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Leigh

Leigh, age 8

Baltimore, MD (1978)

I grew up in a household of two women, my mother and my grandmother, so I was always surrounded by all things fashionable and artsy. It didn't help matters that my mom was an artist and heavily involved in the local art community where we lived in Philadelphia.

I remember being with mom, watching her orchestrate and choreograph fashion shows for the local community during summer vacations. Sometimes I'd get myself on stage too, and do a little runway show of my own.

Mom loved this, of course, and she'd set me up with an outfit to wear, and send me on my way.

Years later, my grandmother told me how I always knew how to charm people - especially the men and other boys - and that was why she always kept a close eye on me.

Sean

Sean, age 3

Upland, CA (1976)

I had a young mom (she was 19 when I was born), and she of course still liked to chill and be 'mellow in the 70's' with her friends when I was young. One of her friends had a son named Perry, that I remember I just wanted to kiss so badly.
I remember thinking 'I like him, I want to kiss him on the mouth' - and so, I did.

In the process, I knocked his 2-year old sexiness down to the ground! My mom and her friends just thought this was a riot, so they snapped a couple of pics.
Were they high? I'm not sure she would ever admit that, if so! LOL!

Anyhow, I remember thinking those thoughts and remember that I liked this kiss from Perry. And I wanted more. So in the years following, I 'made out' with a few other little boys until about 7, when kids start getting weird.

I'd have to wait another 7 years for my next boy-on-boy kiss.

Sean's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Robert Urich (in "Vegas")
I watched the reruns at 12, and thought Dan Tana cruising the strip was hot!
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Luke

Luke, age 3

Flagler Beach, Florida (1989)

I know this photo was taken on a vacation while visiting my uncle’s family. Sadly, I have no recollection of what was occurring at that moment. So in the hopes I was as much like Stewie Griffin as I'd like my younger self to have been, I imagine I must have been aghast due to something about a family member. Such as whenever I was with my uncle's family, I recall pondering over the absurdity of the millions of varicose veins that painted my older aunt's legs.

I discovered I was gay when I was age 12, but I spent the next 11 years doing everything I could for this not to be the case.

Why? Because I was the golden child in my family.

And the pressure to be perfect screwed with my desire for personal happiness.

Plus, I went to a private school where the students' mantra was, 'Kill anything which might seem queer, overweight, ugly, or dorky'.

And I would have been bully fodder, if my appreciation of the "Sailor Moon" series was exposed. But nowadays, I feel I've made a complete 180 change in the way I look at the fact that I’m gay.

What worked helping me, and what I recommend for young gays is:

1) Come out to a fellow gay who doesn’t pose any risk. I didn’t even really know the first person I told my "secret" to would end up being an incredible mentor. And who helped me more than he knows.

2) Fall in love! It's incredible when the desire to publicly express your feelings for someone outweighs your biggest fear.

Luke's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Mario Lopez (But only while acting as Olympic diver Greg Louganis)
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Wayne

Wayne, age 10
Walton Beach, FL (1972)

Here's me, in the finest fashion of that era. And my mother made that fine shirt for me! Thanks, mom! Funny to see now though, as I grew up to be someone "punk" who ended up wearing such a drab palette of black, gray, and denim.

"The original Tony Manero?"

I was pegged as different very early on. My mom tells me I went through a "red" phase, and even wanted to dress myself from head to toe in red, red, and more red. I DO NOT remember that phase.

But I DO remember my thing with "purple" though. I'd read somewhere that purple was the color of "royalty" and I attached some significance to the fact I was a Leo, and therefore the King Of The Beasts. And I was painfully and obviously different. But somehow, I decided all these connections made sense, as purple was the color of my birthright.

Below, you'll see my first crush was Bobby Sherman. But why can I remember each and every word to his show's TV theme song?

"The bluest skies you'll ever see, are in SEATTLE!
And the hills are green as green, in SEATTLE!
Like a beautiful child, growing up free and wild
Full of hope, full of fears, full of laughter, full of tears
Full of dreams to last the years, in SEATTLE!"

I mean, I know the song was on the back of my cereal box and "theme songs" are built on memorability, but really - all of that??? I can't even remember any character or plot on the show!

Wayne's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Bobby Sherman
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Will

Will, age 5

Ephrata, Pennsylvania (1993)

I was a 5-year old kid who liked making his shadow look as much like the ubiquitous "female" symbol seen outside of restrooms as possible.

When this picture was taken, I doubt I even knew what gay was. However, what I did know was that I loved watching "The Wizard Of Oz," and to me there was nobody more terrifying than the Wicked Witch of the West.

And my mother and father didn't blink an eye when I said I wanted to be a witch for Halloween.

For that I really feel blessed, especially because where I lived was a hive of religious, social conservatives.

I just wish I had a picture of me playing with my Pretty Pink Pony.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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