Dean, age 4
Hollywood, Florida (1975)
This picture was taken on Halloween when I was in kindergarten. My sister was 10-years old when I was born, and had always wanted a baby sister. Having two brothers already, my sister had her heart set that I was going to be a girl.
On my birthdate, my mom sent my three siblings off to school, and said that when they got home, they would have a new baby brother or a baby sister.
Well, you can imagine my sister's devastation! It wasn't long before my sister realized that I fit into her dolls' clothing, and she could make me the little sister she always wanted!
I knew I was gay around age 5 or 6.
I remember staring at my sister's boyfriend's Speedo at the water park,
and just knowing that I was different.
At times I thought my life would've been easier if I had been born a girl.
Back in the 1970's, I think the majority of us grew up in an "Archie Bunker" like atmosphere. As for my parents, they were never afraid of using the N word, and were not shy about talking about "the Queers" that lived on the next block.
I remember cringing every time they would start to talk about them, knowing that one day my truth had to come out. That, or I was going to have to run away from home to a place like Pleasure Island from "Pinocchio."
I live in Hollywood, CA now and work as a very successful makeup artist. I've worked on people like Beyonce, Lady Gaga, and Mariah Carey to just name a few. And I am living the life I always dreamed of! I look back on the small stuff now and laugh, because I remember it seeming to be so all-consuming.
For the LGBTQ youth of today, I say:
Follow your dreams and don't change who you are!
Life does get better. It gets as good as you want it to!
Dean's first, famous-person same sex crush:
John Schneider ("Dukes of Hazzard")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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6 comments:
Our daughter would be incredibly jealous of you being able to do Lady GaGa's makeup! I loved Archie Bunker, even though it was politically incorrect... I still watch in amazement, surprised things like that were allowed on television. You have to admit, things have come a long way... stars now have to apologize for using derogatory terms, even in reference to us!
Oh and I love the commercial that has three women in a store who overhear the clerk use the word gay. Clerk: She's so gay! Female customer using the clerks name and speaking to her friends: DId you see her outfit?! It was SO Lindsay!!
The message... stop using derogatory terms to describe something bad. Yes, we have come far!
My sister did the same thing.
I felt my stomache tighten when I read that. I got messages from all around me that the way I felt inside was wrong. I was around 7 or 8. I hid it until I was in my 30's I'm now almost 40. I recently came out to my family. It was met with love, acceptance, and "we knew". But, wow, how this affects you as a child.
awesome!
John Schneider was my first celebrity crush, too! His feathered hair and those tight jeans just looked so good on his handsome, smiling face.
Oh wow dude I freaked out a little when I heard you've done Lady Gagas makeup. That must've been fun and interesting, and..different haha. Glad to hear you're thriving in your career of choice :D
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