Michael

Michael, age 4
Adelaide, South Australia (1988)

After years of hating to look at photos of myself, this is one of my favorites. Because even though there is a happy smile on my face, there is still something different about this little boy!

The name calling and bullying started in 2nd grade. I had no idea what a f*g or a poof was, but I knew it meant I had to try to hide it. But I didn't know how to be what society wanted me to be?

While I loved to play dolls and stuff with my sister, I was obsessed with cars and bikes and doing stupid stunts. So I felt completely confused.

Was I going to turn into a girl like everyone said I was, or was I going to turn into a boy?

When I was 11, it started to make sense: I was a boy who liked boys.

I was also a boy who liked doing girl and boy stuff. And once high school and hormones hit, things got worse. My flamboyant side shoved its way out even more. I hated being me!

I desperately wanted to "own up" to who I really was, and though everyone else knew it, how could I admit to being gay? Then in 10th grade, enough was enough and I came out. The bullying got worse, but I felt secure in myself.

If they were going to torture me, at least I knew it was because of my honesty.

My friends were fine, and not a bit surprised. But I never knew how to tell my parents, so one Wednesday night while watching TV, I just blurted it out.
I was dizzy and in tears. I swore they knew, yet they said they had no idea.

After a few rocky months, they came around. I'm now 27, and have been an out and proud gay man for over 10 years, and life couldn’t be better!

Things HONESTLY do get better.

Just hang in there, and you will figure out how to be the "you" that you were meant to be. And you will do it with your head held high!

Also check out "My First Gay Crush" Blog

Brent

Brent, age 4
Hanover Park, IL (1964)

As a kid I fancied long hair, and loved my mom's hat and dish towel for the full effect.

And this is a YouTube video
of me at this age, where I fashioned a dress out of a dish towel and have that "off the shoulder dress look" going on.

Earlier reports from my family have said I was prone to carrying mum's purse around at family gatherings.


I am happy I was born this way. My friends tell me I laugh in my sleep, actually.

Through all my perils of addictions, cancer, and losing my mate of 19 years to AIDS related ALS, I'm still full of hope and laughter.

Carlos

Carlos, age 7

RS, Brazil (1998)

I live in Brazil, and somehow I always knew that I was gay.

I had many years of discovering myself, and I'm finally happy with who I am!
Now, I'm so lucky with all that I have: my friends, my family, and my boyfriend.
And to all who might feel sad now, there is a happy ending!

James

James, age 7
Bear Valley, WI (1957)

When I look back at this picture now, it brings back the great memories of staying with my grandparents.

I always knew I liked boys from the age of 5. My cousin and I would have sleepovers, and we would hug and kiss each other all the time. What great times they were.

My grandparents always told me it was OK to like boys, or even love them, as long as I was happy. My parents were a different story.

While my mom was very supportive, my dad hauled me off to a priest to confess my "sin" for loving boys.

I sat there and told the priest I loved boys, and that's how it was. And, that I didn't care what he or my old man said.

I can remember the priest saying, "That's alright, but you can't come to church anymore." I just laughed and said, "Good."

As far as the rest of the family went, they never cared one way or the other.

During school, I never had a real problem with me liking boys. And some of the older boys protected me if anyone started anything, like calling me names.

My advice to kids now is:
Just be yourself and don't hide your feelings. If someone yells names at you,
just walk away. Believe me, it does get better as you grow older.

And one more thing:
Leave the drugs and booze alone. They don't get you anywhere.

James' first, famous-person same sex crush:
Donnie Osmond
He was so cute, I dreamed about him. I also had a crush on Michael Jackson
- Check out My First Gay Crush Blog -
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Igor

Igor, age 2
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (1989)

I have only but flashes of my childhood. In our new neighborhood, there were only a few people living nearby. There were no other kids around, and being the chubby kid in school didn't exactly make me the most popular student.

I was being called names since forever, and my only friends were my teachers and the school staff.

I always felt different, and I could tell since the age of 5 that I had a "thing" for boys.

All my friends were girls, and I'd spend most of my time wondering how it would be when I became one. Because I was sure that being a boy wasn't for me.

My father was utterly against my demonstrations of femininity, and he did everything he could to change my ways: soccer, skating, and trying to buy me a motorcycle when I got older.

I remember this one special Christmas when I was around 7-years old, and my uncle gave me a complete set of GI Joe figures, and I couldn't care less about it! All my devotion went to my cousin's new Barbie doll, and I was so jealous of her!
Why couldn't I get the cute gifts?

This picture might seem like nothing special, but it shows how carefree I could be back when I was a baby. The fabulous shoes I had, catwalking in diapers.

When I came out at age 18, I asked my father how could he not be impressed with his gay son, who could sing all the lyrics to "I Will Survive"? Eventually,
my parents came around, and now they're with me every step of the way!

That same energy kept me going until I decided to come out of the closet.
And if there's a "gay energy" that marks us as being happy, no matter what,
then I'm sure I've had it since birth.

To those who, like my boyfriend, still haven't come out, or are struggling hard while doing it, hang on! Be free to do what you like with whoever you like!

That feeling of no shame or guilt or the need to hide, is the best reward you can get in life. It gets better!

Igor's first, famous-person same sex crush:
John Stamos (on "Full House")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Malu

Malu, age 10
São Paulo, Brazil (1999)

This is me and a cousin. I remember feeling so smooth in this hat! Hahahaha

I was always more interested in 'boys' stuff. I remember playing "house" in kindergarten, and I was always  the father and my friend played the mother.

I always liked male characters and identified with them.

Most importantly, I felt attracted to the female characters in cartoons and movies, etc. The oldest memory I have of this is of Saory, from the "Saint Seya" anime.
I think she was my first crush =)

Growing up, I never talked about it with anyone, and it deeply saddened me.

If I could give any advice for those who are still in the closet, it is to open up and talk with someone. It will make you feel loads better!

My parents only discovered about me when I was already in college.
Thinking back, I figure they always knew deep within.

All is well now. I have a girlfriend that I can have at home, and I can visit her home. Surely people are getting more open minded!
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