Joe, age 4
Detroit, Michigan (1975)
The circus was cold that day, it smelled like horse crap, and the clowns were too -- available.
As a dour child growing up in Detroit, I lit up for Wonder Woman, The Bionic Woman, Police Woman - or anything with the word woman in it.
My first crush was John Schneider. I was about 7 when I had a dream about Bo Duke, after watching him skinny dip on "The Dukes of Hazzard."
I was unable to articulate what I was feeling at that age, so I took to scrapbooking photos of him. Well, until Johnny Depp came along.
By then, I knew exactly what I was: A Penis Enthusiast
My mom always says, "You were a miserable child."
Then I remind her it's because, 'I spent 9 months in your miserable womb.'
Joe's first, famous-person same sex crush:
John Schneider (on "Dukes Of Hazzard")________________________________________________
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14 comments:
This is brilliant!!!
I remember that episode of Dukes of Hazzard. Good call.
first of all everything about this picture and post is hilarious and identical to me. I hate clowns and I crushed hard on John Schneider. Like HARD!
This is freaking hysterical!! This made my day!
haha, you're too funny!
I literally just 'snorted' from laughing at your last comment. I think we're related as I loved the same shows!
OMG! I am so using that "miserable womb" remark the next time my mother complains about my childhood. Thanks Joe!
Available clowns!! LOVE IT!! So funny!
"Penis Enthusiast"!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHAAAA
"9 months in your miserable womb" is the best line Miss J has read all week!
I had the skinny dippin' with the Dukes dream too!
I haven't laughed this hard in a LONG time! "nine months in your miserable womb." Thank you for that! =)
I love your "penis enthusiast"! :D It's the perfect summary of the whole concept!
I can't pick a favourite line: you are too angry and funny and your picture made me pee.
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