January 26, 2011


Hiram, age 4
Bethany, Connecticut (1972)

I was born the 8th of 9 children and grew up on a farm in Connecticut. In this photo, I'm dressed like a hippie with my younger sister Mary. My family was very Republican, thus the elephant doll. Notice I'm holding the doll, not Mary.

I always knew I was different, and though there wasn't anything I was more proud of, I was also very insecure about being loved by all people.

Whether it was people I wanted as friends or not, I was just sure that everyone needed to love me.

I had an absolutely wonderful childhood due to two loving parents.

Speaking of my family, my mom's brother is also gay. But accepting that I was gay was very traumatic for me, and lead me to look for life's "pain killers."

I had my first "experience" in Boy Scouts with "Jack" when I was 13. I was also infatuated with "Jeff" my high school friend. I guess I was 14 when I first accepted myself, or cried for the first time when I quasi-accepted I might be gay. But I didn't truly come out to myself until I was 26 years old.

Today, I'm a 42 year old man who has been in a loving, monogamous relationship with my man. Actually, this week on January 28, 2011 - we celebrate 15 years together!

I wish I could have been more secure with myself earlier on, as that could have lead me down different roads. But things happen for reason. My man happened for a reason. I love him dearly, and he reminds me it's funny how life flows.

As far as my family is concerned, I am fully loved and my partner is accepted as one of the family.

Hiram's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Michael Landon (on "Little House On The Prairie")
Dan Haggerty ("Grizzly Adams")
I actually brushed my hand against Grizzly when I saw him at a fair when I was about 10. And yes, of course I still think about it!! ;)

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Paola Avellaneda said...

I think is great that your man is now part of your family!! I hope you continue living your life to the fullest!

Anonymous said...

Oh my god oh my god. I had forgotten about Dan Haggerty as an early crush of mine. Thank you so much for reminding me of him!

I watched the show every week. I don't think I ever missed an episode.

(My entry here, by the way, is: http://borngaybornthisway.blogspot.com/2011/01/brian_23.html)

Spouse Walker said...

I ADORE those trousers. I was a bit older than you that year and had a pair of sun yellow (don't even need to tell me how fabulous) bellbottoms.