|"Me and my best gal pal!"|
Benton, AR (1977)
My mom took this picture of me and Connie, my best friend from next door. My dad was a man's man and a building contractor who had been doing some repairs on our roof and left the ladder leaning up against the house.
Connie and I posed by the ladder for my mom, but I decided that I would climb up on the ladder so I could be seen in the picture better.
As you can see, I'm giving my best over the shoulder look.
Growing up, my family were Jehovah's Witnesses. So, I felt different because of that, in addition to feeling different due to my sexuality. I felt like a freak among freaks. The literature that the Witnesses put out regarding homosexuality pretty much all said that if I just prayed hard enough, God would help me overcome these "unnatural feelings."
So, I prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed - and nothing happened. God never changed me into a heterosexual. I took that to be because He didn't want to, not because He couldn't. So, I stopped trying. And, I did my best to get by until I was old enough to leave.
I eventually wound up living 800 miles away from my family. When I started dating my husband 13 years ago, I was so happy and I came out to my sister over the phone. I told her not to tell my parents, but I knew she would. I figured I had a week to call them and tell them myself before she burst.
When I told my mom 3 days later, she said that she had known for a long time. I'm sure my posing for this picture was a big clue for her. My dad on the other hand, wasn't quite as prepared. He told me that day, 'I'm not sure that I really understand this. I'm not sure that I like this. But, you're my son and I love you regardless.'
From that point on, my parents and I rebuilt a great relationship. At the time of his passing in 2009, my father considered my husband to be part of the family.
Looking at this picture now, all I can say is, 'Damn, I was a cute kid!'
A cute kid who was blessed to have wonderful parents who taught me the meaning of unconditional love.
LaMar's first, famous-person same sex crushes:Ricky Schroeder & Jason Bateman (both from "Silver Spoons")
Neil Patrick Harris (as "Doogie Howser, MD")
OMG! to this day NPH (coached by hugh laurie) and rick schroeder (coached by ian mckellen) have pillow fights in a secret room in my head. patrick stewart narrates.
I'm quite impressed by the reaction of your parents. My experience has been definitely different. I am happy for you, for having a family that is able to love you.
I'm so happy for you! I too am from a religious background and know that I love God and know that He loves me. I'm in college now and I too have tried to pray it away, but am starting realize that maybe he DID make me this way. Your story really brings hope to me.
I'm a former Jehovah's Witness whose parents are still JWs. Much to my surprise they haven't shunned me although the relationship has changed somewhat since I left. I'm happy to hear that your parents have been so accepting of you and your husband. What a gift.
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