Spencer

Spencer, age 4

Fullerton, CA (1988)

I didn't know I was different for the whole "liking boys" thing when I was younger. I liked boys and that was that, even if I did still have girls I said were my girlfriend. What I knew I was different about me was my stature. By the time I was in 6th grade, I was 6'1" and weighed around 220lbs - and I still grew quite a bit more after that.

"Just sitting here, being gorgeous"

I was chubby, tall, AND gay. As Sarah Palin might say, I was in everybody's crosshairs (especially since I've lived in Orange County for most of my life). The torment ensued throughout school, but I conquered and I'm now a 6'5" mix of cynicism and vulgarity.

Looking back at this picture from today's perspective - with the color-matched sleeveless shirt & shorts combo, the messy blond locks of hair (now brown), and a come-hither smirk - it's probably the earliest photographic evidence of what I still live up to today: understatedly gay, yet overwhelmingly fabulous. :-)

Sadly, as a "trained" LGBT ally/professor for a local university, there's still nothing particularly groundbreaking enough to say to today's gay kids, at least nothing that hasn't already been said.

So, I'll repeat this: It can get better.
But in order for it to actually BE better, you have to be here to see it.

Spencer's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Ryan Phillippe
At 13, I dragged my mom to see '54' when it came out