Mike

Mike, age 5

Pendleton, Indiana (1977)

Don’t be fooled by the masculine blue pajamas I'm wearing. This photo takes place before I'd started dressing up in my mom's old nightgowns, a wig, and costume jewelry. Me and my little sister (pictured here) would both get diva’d up and prance around the house, lip-synching to Marie Osmond and The Mandrell Sisters. Or pretend we were the oil baroness wives from Dallas.

I always liked to play Sue Ellen Ewing, because she was so deliciously mean.
And drunk...

"Wishing Luke Skywalker would use the Force on me."

Our neighbor Cindy would come over and the three of us would create elaborate dramas, with each of our characters a beautiful runway model.

I always wanted to play an aging star who was losing her beauty, but determined to do so with grace and attitude.

Even at an early age, I knew that milking a situation for all its turmoil was, in a word, tragifabulous.

And yet, I first knew
I was gay around age 5.


I was in love with Mark Hamill and wanted to be Luke Skywalker. But more importantly, I wanted to touch his perfectly tanned chest. The way his desert poncho allowed just the slightest glimpse of his collarbone and pec muscles did something to me that I couldn't explain.

All I knew was that whenever my sister would leave her Princess Leia doll unattended, I'd force Luke and Leia to do some serious heavy petting - even though I didn’t understand it.

Growing up gay in the Midwest in the 70's might not have been ideal, but my family was supportive and allowed me to be me. Their mantras were:
'We’re not everybody else' and 'It doesn’t matter what other people think.'

And what can you say about a mother who sews her son a Wonder Woman costume from scratch, and lets him wear it to his Kindergarten Halloween party?
I would say, that's the definition of love.

Mike's first, famous-person same sex crushes:

Mark Hamill (in "Star Wars") & Donnie Osmond
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Gary

Gary, age 3

Palmdale, CA (1984)

Every summer my family would travel to Iowa to visit my uncle, who was a pastor. My dad was also a pastor back home. The last thing I wanted to do on this particular summer morning was wear a sweater and go to church! And I certainly didn't want to pose for photos.

Luckily, my grandma was able to snap this picture and capture the beginnings of the little gay grandbaby she called 'Sweetface.'

Even from a young age,
it was obvious that the red triangle on my sweater should have been pink.

As a teen, I worried about telling my uber-religious family about being gay, but when I finally came out (after I graduated law school...ugh...I waited so long), a funny thing happened: They all loved me for it, even Pastor Dad and Pastor Uncle.

I worried so much for years and years, only to find out they loved me because I was who I was.

And now, they even love my boyfriend.

Gary's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Hulk Hogan

I had a recurring dream where he'd be giving me piggy-back rides. HAHAHA!
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Julia

Julia, age 6

Sydney, Australia (1988)

This is Christmas day, and my sisters and their "long lost brother". Luckily my parents were supportive of my rejection of gender roles in their gift-giving. And thanks to my nanna who made those awesome pajamas.

A year before this photo, my neighbors gave me a Barbie doll, which I proceeded to throw back over the fence into their yard. It was totally out of character for me, being so rude to people that weren't my family. But I was a bit pissed off.

Pissed off, because I played with their son quite often, and they should've known I wasn't into such "girly" toys. I still feel quite ashamed, because they were actually quite nice people. A big sorry to Mr. & Mrs. Lee, wherever you might be.

I started noticing that I was drawn to women and girls my own age a couple of years after this photo was taken. But it wasn't until I started high school at 12, that I fell absolutely in love with a girl in my class.

At that point, I knew for certain that I was a massive queer.

We had moved to a small regional coastal town when I was 8, and I was fairly quiet as a teenager so, I didn't feel confident enough to come out during high school. Despite having boyfriends until university, I was still getting into queer popular culture, and listening to Ani Difranco, Tori Amos, and Madonna.

When I finally came out, it amazed me that I had so many similar interests to other queers. Here I was thinking I was all unique, only to find out that I was just another stereotypical lezbot. Not that it bothers me, and it's great to finally be out.

The only regret I have is giving up skateboarding - I tried to have a go last year but had an unfortunate run in with a gum nut which put an end to that endeavour. Oh, to be a fearless tomboy again!

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Nathan

Nathan, age 7

Saint Paris, OH (1992)

Here I am, 7-years old at the County Fair, and throwing some shade to the camera. I grew up on a farm in rural Ohio.

I always knew I was different. I always loved playing with my sister's Barbies,
My Little Pony, and Rainbow Brite dolls.

I remember being teased and taunted for being gay, before I even really knew what being gay meant.

Back then, I loved dancing to Michael Jackson.
And now, this picture makes me smile : )

Nathan's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Cary Elwes (in "The Princess Bride")

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Tat

Tat, age 11
Queensland, Australia (1988)

My childhood was all about waiting. Waiting to work out why I saw things differently, and waiting for all the pieces to make sense.

Pieces like really liking my best friend; having fun and free flowing conversations with boys, but shy and 'funny feeling' half-talks with girls; playing with Cabbage Patch Kids and Barbies, but not knowing why I didn't want Ken and Big Bear included as well.

Or why I loved with resounding imaginative passion Anne of Green Gable & George from "Famous Five;" repetitively reading Miles Franklin's "My Brilliant Career". And, knowing Emma Thompson was an ethereal goddess.

I have mixed feelings about this pic, as it epitomizes all that waiting.


Soon after this photo, things changed to me 'waiting to leave.'
Leave my childhood, my small town, Catholicism, and 'being different.'

At age 11, it was starting to make sense. But with a Catholic overlay and my account of 'women who liked women’ to be crew-cuts, jeans, and white linen shirts with boots - I was not sure that all that, was me.

Thankfully I left my town and family to learn all the pieces were gay. And in time, more importantly learned that I was a "gay lady" - with passions for designer handbags, cut jeans, high heels, flowing dresses, weekend converse, blow-dryers & hair strengtheners, and impeccably neat skirt suits. Interestingly,
I have never quite gotten the hang of cosmetics.

I currently live in a place where being out is detrimental to my physical and mental health. I have made a decision not to be open whilst I'm here - but to 'hide in plain sight' with my femme presentation.

Every now and again this makes me feel like a traitor. But on balance, it is just for now, and not forever. At least, here, right now, I am no longer waiting:
I now know, and am ecstatic about, who I am.

Tat's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Emma Thompson
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Chris

Chris, age 6 months
Goldsboro, NC (1972)

Looking back, now I understand why I had such a emotional attachment to guys at such a early age. I hoped this would go away as I grew older, but it didn't.

I dated girls from 9th grade until the end of High School, hoping the gay rumors would go away - but they never did, either.

I came out to my family at 25, because I was never good at secrets. As an adult, I'm into nerdy TV like PBS, National Geographic, History Channel, & Discovery Channel.

And movies like "Big Eden" and "The Note Book" are favorites of mine. I am now 38, still single, and it does get lonely sometimes.


But never the less, I am HAPPY! :-)

Chris' first, famous-person same sex crush:

Bob Denver ("Gilligan's Island")

I know that sounds weird, but...
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