Sarah

Sarah, age 4
Tuscon, Arizona (1979)

For this kindergarten photo, I told the photographer I wanted a "serious picture." But the more he tried to make me smile, the more serious I got. And I do NOT like this dress. I wanted to wear my fireman's hat, which I was usually allowed to do, as my parents weren't really invested in any particular gender expression.

I love this picture because of its emotional honesty: I'm not smiling because I don't feel like smiling. And no one was going to push me into feeling or doing something I don't want.

While this is harder to accomplish as an adult, it's always my goal.

At this age, I knew I was a little different, and had a nascent crush on my kindergarten teacher. But I didn't yet have the words for it.

I went on to be viciously bullied in middle school, and I hope those kids are all in jail now.

Today, I have a loving partner and a diverse group of friends, and I became a writer and a teacher.

Bigoted speech -- especially the phrase "That's so gay" -- is forbidden in my classroom. Consequences are swift and severe, if I hear it.

My message to LGBTQ youth is:
Respect yourself! And do not "ignore" the bullying, because it doesn't work.
It only makes you more vulnerable; more victimized.

Bullies can tell when you're "ignoring" them, and it makes them want to do whatever they can to make you crack. The onus for stopping bullying is NOT on you -- it's on the bully, as well as the adults in charge.

You must keep talking, keep complaining, and keep demanding that something
be done - UNTIL SOMETHING IS DONE. Look your principal in the eye, and be sure to mention Jamie Nabozny - who won a huge federal lawsuit against his school administrators for failing to stop anti-gay harassment.

Lastly, keep saving your money...
There are buses leaving every day for other cities, and you can be on them!

Sarah's first, famous-person same sex crush:
Karen Carpenter (singer, The Carpenters)

Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Thom

Thom, age 10
Orlando, Florida (1973)

This is my sister and I shot at Disney World. I find the hat I'm wearing to be a
big revel of my true self. This is how I was born, and I am free and happy!

I grew up in Ft. Lauderdale, FL
and I recall being a mascot for my father's football team. And I remember my mom seeing me cheerleading in my football gear with all the cheerleaders.

I'm also not the only gay member of my family. A much younger relative just came out, and he praised me for being myself, and helping to make his experience hopeful and easier.

Today, I'm 48 and happy and living in New York City.

I'm surrounded by my siblings and their children, and I feel very loved.
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
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Dean

Dean, age 4
Hollywood, Florida (1975)

This picture was taken on Halloween when I was in kindergarten. My sister was 10-years old when I was born, and had always wanted a baby sister. Having two brothers already, my sister had her heart set that I was going to be a girl.

On my birthdate, my mom sent my three siblings off to school, and said that when they got home, they would have a new baby brother or a baby sister.

Well, you can imagine my sister's devastation! It wasn't long before my sister realized that I fit into her dolls' clothing, and she could make me the little sister she always wanted!

I knew I was gay around age 5 or 6.
I remember staring at my sister's boyfriend's Speedo at the water park,
and just knowing that I was different.

At times I thought my life would've been easier if I had been born a girl.

Back in the 1970's, I think the majority of us grew up in an "Archie Bunker" like atmosphere. As for my parents, they were never afraid of using the N word, and were not shy about talking about "the Queers" that lived on the next block.

I remember cringing every time they would start to talk about them, knowing that one day my truth had to come out. That, or I was going to have to run away from home to a place like Pleasure Island from "Pinocchio."

I live in Hollywood, CA now and work as a very successful makeup artist. I've worked on people like Beyonce, Lady Gaga, and Mariah Carey to just name a few. And I am living the life I always dreamed of! I look back on the small stuff now and laugh, because I remember it seeming to be so all-consuming.

For the LGBTQ youth of today, I say:
Follow your dreams and don't change who you are!
Life does get better. It gets as good as you want it to!

Dean's first, famous-person same sex crush:
John Schneider ("Dukes of Hazzard")
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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Jim

Jim, age 3
West Orange, NJ (1985)

This picture was taken shortly after my uncle's wedding. You'll be shocked to know, that a few years later I was throwing Wonder Woman themed birthday parties and telling my parents, "When I grow up, I want to be a mommy."

Needless to say, when I did come out 17 years later, everyone's reaction was not
"How did we not know?!" - but rather a collective, "Finally!"

It's not always rainbows and lollipops being gay, but it has gotten so much better.
Even if I'm not a mommy ... yet.

And most nights, you'll find me with family and friends in this exact same pose.
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Robert

Robert, age 3
Cleveland, Ohio (1955)

This picture was, and still is, the real me. I have always been a record collector.
I am 59, African-American, and GAY.

I was mostly OK until Kindergarten.

My teacher there told my father that I liked to play with the girls and their dolls. He told me, 'Boys do not play with dolls' and he did not like that at all. So, he taught me "boy stuff," like throwing a football.

The next trials came when I went to Junior High School. The other boys did not want me on their teams. I was called a sissy by most of them.

My 8th grade teacher asked me, 'Robert, are you a faggot?'

The other boys at that time called me "Rob-Butt" and there was also bullying and ridicule from the older, larger boys. So, I kept to myself. It wasn't as bad when I got to High School. Most of the boys had failed their classes, and I graduated at 17.

I told my parents that I am gay when I was 19. My father took it as a failure on his part. But I told him it had nothing to do with him. My mother thought I would grow out of it, but I have not. I have been out and proud since I was 19, and was even in the Marine Corps Reserve Program.

The reason I like this blog, is that everyone says it gets better - and it does!
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Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin' Tweet

Timothy

Timothy, age 8
Tulsa, OK (1973)

My road to acceptance was a long one. First of all, know that my father was super masculine major league baseball player Jim Beauchamp, so I had to be his worst nightmare. It took him awhile to get used to the fact he didn't really have two boys and a girl, but one that was sort of "in between." Check the hand on my hip...

I knew I was gay from the first time I ever heard the word.

When I heard my older brother describing me as "gay" and "sissy," I thought to myself,
"Yep... that's me!"

I really struggled with acceptance of my gender identity up until the age where I hit puberty.

And there was something about that testosterone burst that pushed me over the edge and made me glad to be a guy.

Up until then I was destined for gender reassignment surgery.

I can't remember ever asking for gender appropriate toys, or developing normal friendships with boys. I used to blackmail my sister to get her to ask for the toys
I wanted by threatening, "All right, Ann Rene, I'm squealing if you don't ask for Barbie's Malibu Beach House for Christmas!"

Christmas would come and I would tear through my footballs, baseballs and other sports equipment. But then, I'd join my sister in frantically opening her presents, and we would SCREAM, HUG EACH OTHER, and JUMP WITH DELIGHT at the sight of a new Easy Bake Oven or Barbie's 747 Jumbo Jet.

Every now and then I'd steal a glance at my father slumped in his chair with his, "What did I do wrong? This can't be happening!" look on his face. Poor guy...

And my message to young LGBTQ kids is BE WHO YOU ARE!
You are our future, and we love you just the way you are.
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Also check out "My First Gay Crush Blog"

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