David

David, age 8

Corpus Christi, TX (1988)

When I came out to my mom in high school, she told me she already knew.

Judging by the picture I've posted,
well - of course she knew!

Throughout my childhood, my mom nurtured my creativity. And she never tried to instill in me the "normal" behavior for boys.

From dancing around wearing her bangles, or singing along to Bette Midler's "Perfect Isn't Easy" from "Oliver & Company," my mom just let me be ME.


Sure, my mom worried about how the world would treat me, but she never felt that it gave her cause to change my behavior.

She knew that with a strong foundation of love and acceptance at home, I could take on the hate I might encounter elsewhere.

Stephen

Stephen, age 4

Ponoka, Alberta, Canada (1989)

I was awkward as a kid, like being accident prone. Also I was probably the tallest person in my school throughout most of my elementary, middle, and high school years. So I stuck out like a sore thumb. It bothered me, because when you are different when younger, children are cruel.

As early as age 5, I dressed up in my mom's clothes, playing with her makeup.

I didn't see anything wrong with it. My parents didn't see anything wrong with it when I was younger either.

I eventually figured I was too old for that kind of stuff so I stopped. It didn't mean I didn't have fun doing it though. It was always nice.

When I was 13, I started to realize I liked other boys.
I KNEW I was different earlier, but this was when hormones happened.

My parents were far more accepting of the things I did than I give them credit for. My dad was always saying things like "F*g this" or "Queer that" and I guess that's what happens when you are raised Catholic. He just didn’t like gays.

But when I told him I was gay, he seemed to change his whole perspective, which is a good thing. My mom always said, "It's your life. Do what you want with it."

After suffering through a couple years of depression after coming out, I look back on my picture and think "I'm almost back to being that kid again. Not caring. Just happy." And I really am. It's a long process though.

Words of advice to all my fellow LGBTQ people:
Go into your childhood photos. Find a picture of you looking happy, and tell yourself that you will be that happy again. That has worked wonders for me

Stephen's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Ryan Gosling (in "Breaker High" and "Young Hercules")

I actually cried during the 'Young Hercules' episode when Ryan appeared to die.
____________________________________________________

Treva

Treva, age 4

Chicago, Illinois (1965)

I knew from a very young age that I was different from everyone in my family.
I made up reasons as to how I was different - i.e. adopted, switched at birth, stolen, and even that I was half alien! As a young child I detested dresses. The only way I would wear one was if it was blue, so I was always dressed in blue and my younger sister in pink.

One year in high school a butch girl was in my class. I was fascinated by her and sat next to her all year. She wore mens' clothes and had a pocket watch! I was too afraid to talk to her, but I defended her almost daily to all my friends. I still remember her with fondness!

I never knew that women could be together until after I was already married.
I broke up with my husband and came out when I was 33. And now my ex husband introduces me to other women as a marital aid! He still regrets that.

My oldest daughter outed me to my family one Christmas, by walking in the house and declaring "Merry Christmas, my mom is gay!" I didn't find this out until two years later.

Let me say that I am not your stereotypical lesbian. I am fem, have 3 daughters, and 3 grandchildren. I love being gay, and that was what was missing from my life as a straight. And I will never go back!

I've recently started doing drag and love that too. I love pushing the envelope and making people think. I believe that we can be anything we want, as long as we have fun and hurt no one.

As for the gay youth of today, I think they are on the right track. Being gay is way more open and accepted then it was when I was young.

So try to be true to yourself, and everything else will come.

Treva's first, famous-person same sex crushes:

Tie: Trixie on "Speed Racer" and Maryann on "Gilligans Island"

Later I was all about Linda Hamilton in 'The Terminator.'
I like my butch girls! 

_____________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"

Click to follow my blog with Bloglovin' Tweet

John

John, age 12

Nanuet, NY (1976)

I was, by nature, a smiley, giggly, and cheerful kid. And uncoordinated, though I loved to swim, bodysurf, skateboard, and gymnastics. Only 20 years later did I realize I had "killer abs" under the baggy t-shirt 'n jeans I wore from grades 6 through 10. Before that, I refused to wear jeans. Slacks from Sears only, please!

I was a total nerd in the math league, academic league, and national honor society. And, I was on track to be the first of my immediate family to attend college. However, homophobia nearly derailed all of it.

Around this age I gave up being me, because whatever that was, it was perceived as HORRIBLE. So I learned to butch it up. With sports not an option, partying was the next best thing. And by the end of high school, this nerd-boy was close to not graduating. And I flamed out in my freshmen semester of college.

I soon accepted that having sex with guys wasn't a stop-gap measure until I got married. Which I planned to do, to a nice girl whom I would never pressure sexually. My mantra in grade 12 was "In college you can be yourself."

Except I couldn't. The names were different, but the jocks and knuckleheads from high school were now my neighbors in the dorm. And, I unraveled.

But I pulled it together and transferred to a school farther away from home, beginning to tip toe out of the closet. By the time I graduated, I was sort of out. Within 6 months, the family all knew. And while it took a lot of years, eventually everyone got there in terms of celebration. Screw tolerance or acceptance, thanks.

What I've got now that's really important, is I got ME back. With dignity, and with integrity. Everything's possible once you get 'em, and it's impossible to live without them once you've had 'em.

To my younger gay brothers and sisters, my only advice is:
Education, education, education! College or a trade/vocational school will lead to your financial independence. I killed myself in college working 3 jobs, because I believed my parents would disown me if they found out I was gay. But that work ethic has served me well throughout my life.

Today, I'm still a nerd working at a university, and I have a hot husband and a nice home. And I'm out everywhere to everyone.

John's first, famous-person same sex crush:

Tom Selleck

Or any photo of a man with a beard, moustache, or stubble...
__________________________________________________

Adam

Adam, age 8

Brockport, NY (1992)

I found this pic in a collage my mom created. It's my sister, brother and me feeding ducks by a pond. I'm obviously the fabulous one with my knee popped, wrist broken backwards, and hand on my hips! All very "You go girl!" right?

I figured out I was gay around the age of 15.

I discovered when watching late night Skinomax, I was more interested in looking at the guys instead of the girls.

I've since looked back, pondering why I had such a strong interest in Shredder from the "Ninja Turtles." Mask + leather + gear = HOT!

I came out to my parents at 16, and remember the night in great detail. I decided early during the day that tonight was the night.


I was all nervous and couldn't sit still as we were watching the great TV lineup of "Everybody Loves Raymond" and "Antiques Road Show."

My dad was like, "What's up with you tonight?" I couldn't find the courage to say the words "I'm gay" and just said "I have to tell you something but I can't say it."

Without skipping a beat, my father says "You're gay?" I said "Yep." He then said, "We've known for a while, but wondered when you would figure it out."

So when I saw this picture again, I understood their reaction when I came out.
Today, I still have this fabulous flair - and I'm glad I was born this way!

Ed

Ed, age 8

Scranton, PA (1963)

When my mother died recently, I found this photo of me. Simply ravishing, if
I do say so myself. I love how this picture reminds me of being free as a child.

I was an only child and learned early to entertain myself. While I was smart enough to read by age 3, I was also socially naive.

At this age, no one seemed to mind how I acted. Even my parents weren't concerned. In fact, my mother dressed me as Heidi for Halloween in 3rd grade!

Since I was very excited about cars too, I think they were calmer than if I had only played with dolls.

It was several more years before all the bullying and teasing began in junior high, and it was then that I figured out I was different than most of the other kids.

Thankfully, that's long behind me.

And now I have a wonderful partner and circle of friends.  It does get better!

Dexter

Dexter, age 6

Manila, Philippines (1984)

I knew I was "different" when I was 4-years old, and of course, I did not have the words to describe that part of me. And it was difficult for me to define myself because I - like most Filipinos - come from a conservative Catholic family.

I grew up listening to "The Wiz" and "Annie" soundtracks. And to Madonna, who I vogued to in private. TV, movies, and books were my only companions, as I did not have any friends.

I had a feeling then that Bert & Ernie from "Sesame Street" were more than roommates, and that the "Hardy Boys" were definitely having adventures together outdoors and indoors.

In my dreams, "Robocop" was my "roommate," and we weren't solving mysteries.

Looking at my childhood now that I am an adult, I was a very sad boy.

I handled the bullying by taking my mind away from reality. I spent my non-school days locked in the house, and not wanting to interact with anyone.

But everything is different now: I am living with my partner, I am extremely happy, and I do not have to escape to feel that happiness.

Now, the two of us listen to my Madonna and Abba (his favorite) records together, and we spend the weekends having South Australian adventures.

And yes: we have our adventures both outdoors and indoors.
____________________________________________________

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"
Click to follow this blog with Bloglovin' Tweet

Gabi

Gabi, age 7
Lido di Jesolo, Italy (1973)

I'm on a vacation here, riding a kid's motorbike on a little racetrack at a fun fair. Every night I begged my mom for money to go another round. I grew up in a small town in the center of Germany. I always liked skating, biking, or building igloos in winter, more than playing with dolls, dressing up, or playing hopscotch.

The first crush I had was on a woman, and early on I was fascinated by lesbian love. I had gay and lesbian friends, yet I was always dating men. In my mid-20s I had my first one-night stand with a woman.

Although this was a fascinating experience for me, I only really quit trying to be straight in my mid-40s. My coming-out to my friends, colleagues, and family members was in 2009, after I had fallen in love with a woman. We had met during my visit of a mutual friend in the USA and fell in love almost instantly.

We continued our 17-hour-one-way long-distance relationship for almost a year, seeing each other only every couple of months. I split up with my then-boyfriend a few weeks after I returned home. I came out in a long e-mail, to about 70 people, including my boss. The response was overwhelmingly positive.

We got married in April 2010. She moved across the Atlantic last September, and we now live in the Netherlands, where gay people have identical rights as straight people. Even though we married in Iowa, I couldn't apply for family-based immigration, because Federal US immigration law doesn't acknowledge us as a family (Defense of Marriage Act). Therefore, she gave up her home and moved her cats and herself here. She is now learning Dutch and trying to find a job.

What I would like to tell every kid, whether they feel they are gay or not, is that it's important to find out who you are and what you want. You only have one life.

Be who you are. Everything else will eventually follow.

Steve

Steve, age 11

Victoria, BC, Canada (1974)

This picture shows me with my mother, in all our mid-70's sartorial splendor. From a very early age, there was always something "different" about me.

When playing games with other kids, I was usually given some type of female role.

If we played "Mission: Impossible," I was cast as Cinnamon Carter.

It was never forced upon me, or something pejorative, but rather a natural fit.

Years later, I got to meet Barbara Bain, the actress who portrayed Cinnamon, and I told her "You know, I used to play you" - and she roared with laughter.
_____________________________________________________

Brittany

Brittany, age 5

Galesburg, IL (1992)

For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be just like my dad. In this picture, as you can see, I'm wearing a tank like him and posing like him. And look at those guns! He has always been my hero, above all others.

I knew on some level I had a crush on my kindergarten teacher, which was around this time in my life.

I also was beating all the boys at sports and things we did on the playground.

I loved playing with dad's old G.I. Joe figures, and shooting my toy bow and arrow in the basement

I wanted to be Robin Hood.

Although, I didn't fully admit that I'm a lesbian until I was 17.



But once I came out, I looked back and realized SO many instances over the years that made me slap my forehead and think: How could I NOT have known?

When I came out to my parents, they were devastated, as they are very religious. My dad said that somehow he wasn't surprised, and had seen this coming.
It killed me to disappoint him. All I had ever wanted was to impress him and be strong, just like him.

My parents are not in my life now, but I can honestly say that though I miss them terribly and wish things were different, I am so glad that I figured out who I really am.

I have felt more freedom and learned more about myself and the world since
I came out, than I ever thought I could. I know that a lot of why I have made it out on my own is how strong my dad raised me to be, and I am proud to be his daughter every day.

Not everyone understands us, or why we are the way we are, but that's okay - they don't have to. We all have to make our own way, and as long as you are happy with your life and the decisions you have made, that is what really matters.