January 17, 2011


Joshua, age 7
Bradenton, Florida (1987)

I was a child who was very much in my own world. Spending most of my time drawing mermaids and princesses, I had a hard time focusing at school. I got made fun of a lot for being a girl because most of my recesses were spent playing house, trying to cartwheel, or wishing I was brave enough climb and sit on top of the monkey bars. I coped by retreating into my head, which I was very happy in, but resulted in a lot of strange outward behavior. I guess I was an odd kid.

"Easter Sunday portraits were always a good opportunity to
dress up, eat peeps, go to church - and VOGUE!

This photo was taken on Easter Sunday before my family went to church.
I remember my mom bought us all new outfits for the occasion and needless to say - I felt very chic. I remember wanting this picture to count - so I told my sister Bethany (the one closest to me) how to pose, and then I struck one myself. I don't think my parents had any idea what I was doing. They're still relatively unfazed by this picture, and I think they're just "used to me."

I didn't fully come out until I was in my mid 20's. I was brought up in a very conservative Christian home and it took a long time for me to fully separate myself from that. I don't remember not "feeling different" though. I was obviously a very flamboyant child and I never really fit in anywhere.

I am incredibly proud of this picture. Even though I was a little late to "come out" I was always pretty fearless about expressing myself and my interests.

Joshua's first, famous-person same sex crushes:
"Marky Mark" Wahlberg, Joel West, & Marcus Schenkenberg.
Obviously, I liked the 90's male models.

Click here - "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
Click here - "My First Gay Crush Blog"


Anonymous said...

I love it! I think it amazing to look back and see yourself as a child and how you grew into an adult. Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

probably the best photo iv seen here so far --